retro-nun-porn-03Religion has about as much to do with God, as strippers do with college admission. (Yes I said it!)

We all know that horrible things have been done in the name of religion, like the porno Nude Nuns with Big Guns (what started out as a genuflection turned into a salty ablution), the genocide of the Natives, and drinking cheap wine with stale bread.

But recently this Pope Guy has been doing stuff, well to be honest it’s what he hasn’t done that really stirring things up. So far he wasn’t a Hitler Youth like the last one, he didn’t wear any child’s rectum as a glove, he hasn’t done the full RuPaul Drag race attire. He definitely dresses more conservatively. He even sneaks out to be amongst people.

images (4)I don’t mean to get off on a rant here but does this Pope Guy even believe in Christ! Hasn’t he gotten to memo to bless the drones before they go off to kill in the name of God, His particular incarnation on the USA dollar? Last week he had the audacity to criticize how America practices capitalism, saying we need to care about the poor. Frankly if it wasn’t for me being broke I wouldn’t care about helping the poor because we inherit the kingdom of heaven. The poorer you are the more land you get in heaven, and the more those with less or none can be coerced into working for you in careless and landless sort of way because heaven is ruled by Feudalism. All these suckas went to school to avoid a war. I went to school to get rich in a lobotomized  neutered afterlife.

Luckily for all of us Rush Limbaugh is there to “Scorch the Pope” probably because with everyone wearing crucifixes  just nailing him would be so blase ? Also Rush if grounded in traditional Christian values that favor burning.

getsI’m as religious as tube socks and lotion, but if someone has the cohones enough to talk the talk and walk the walk past the bowl of oxycotin  and actually do stuff  then by all means we should let them. Anyways we see what God does to his followers, his best followers are known by how spectacularly they have died. One tied to a cross and shot full of arrows,  some as a snack for lions on the paleo-diet (raw meat and body hair for fibre). I imagine if Papa John [only his best friends call him that especially on Monday when its half off the entry fee to heaven when the Jet’s win on Sunday] continues talking about helping the poor and all this other altruistic bullshit he will die and maybe 20 years later we will find that he died of polonium poisoning which the French will deny and we will go back to TV dinners delivery straight to our mouths by drones.

Yeah, I think I’m right this time.


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