EPIC RANT || Chocolate Just May Save the Fucking World (Adult topics discussed)

DISCLAIMER – If jokes about Masturbation disturb you, you are either a priest and have been inside more children than the devil himself or you’re different. Sensible topic discussed below with inappropriate language.


I don’t mean to get off on a rant here but does the world need saving ?

The world was here before our species. If we manage to destroy ourselves, the world will continue on. That is until a few billion years from now when the Sun swells up like a 50 year old’s prostate, engulfing our planet and blocking up that cosmic drain of life that had for centuries discharged over the Earth’s face. Speaking of being cosmically backed up, the brain-trust down at NPR posted this article today: How Chocolate Might Save The Planet.

Really ? Is that the kind of thinking it takes to write at NPR? Maybe I should share my idea, how the distribution and use of Bi-racial Fleshlight just may ease racial tension in America. For those of you who don’t know a flesh light is a quality adult sex toy men on the go use. They don’t have time for trivialities like dating or bartering movies, expensive dinners and feigned interest for sex. Limited Blue color for Avatar enthusiastic aside, a flesh light is comprised of the popular fleshy feeling plastic (with 48 different texture) stuck inside the an unappealing hard exterior shell. I have a pic of a fleshlight, for the curious among you

Celebrity Sightings In London - April 28, 2013


Excuse the joke.

No matter how much work is done on her face, Donatella Versace’s lips are not like a fleshlight. One is a completely plastic tool used for the discreet collection of sperm and the other is a fleshlight.

But I digress.  Carlos Santana wants to save the world through MusicAdvertising Might be Able to Save the World, A skateboard can save the world, Washing your jeans less might save the world, Eating this Ice cream might help save the world, Generation Z, the same people who brought you butt chugging just may save the world (I’ve hoping they will all sterilize themselves and hasten our departure from this planet. ( BTW can someone remind Santana that people have been playing music for millennia, music can’t save shit)

With so many things around that can save the world it’s amazing that it is dying. What is interesting to me is that in none of these articles does anyone say that the planet or our world is dying. That’s how I know all these articles are crock full of shit like my 6 month old nephew’s diapers.

Wouldn’t the first step in saving the world be admitting we are actively trying to kill it with our laissez-faire attitude about human rights and the ecosystem? The second step would have to be a clear assessment of how we are killing the world/planet so we know what to stop doing? If it is any consolation there are tons of people denying climate change and global warming despite overwhelming data.

I’m so tired of reading these god awful articles. They highlight some obscure fact. Then through some labyrinthine and obtuse deduction arrive at a conclusion. This doesn’t work unless you ignore the different languages, social conventions, and even the many meaning to the word saved. Saved will mean something a lot different to a Christian than i does to a Native American or Aborigine.

I lost it when the schmuck who thinks chocolate can save the world never mentioned fair trade chocolate or some of the abuses of the industry. If chocolate is going to save the world shouldn’t our method of procurement at least not exploit people around the globe? Chocolate might save the world imagined in the writers head full of unicorns puppies an an egregious lack of STD’s.

So next time you read an article or someone tells you that something or someone can save the world, tell them to eat a bag of dicks because that will stop wars and malnutrition around the world.

End Rant

this is an actualy fleshlight



Radical French Politician suggests Ebola as solution to global population explosion

Jean-Marie Le PenJean-Marie Le Pen, founder of France’s far-right Front National, has suggested the deadly virus Ebola could solve the global “population explosion” and by extension Europe’s “immigration problem”. At a cocktail party before an election rally in Marseille on Tuesday evening, days before the European elections in which the FN is leading the polls in France, Le Pen spoke of the “demographic explosion” in the world.

“Monseigneur Ebola could sort that out in three months,” he said in front of journalists.

Later, addressing supporters, Le Pen, 85, said he feared the French population risked being “replaced … by immigrants”. “In our country and in all Europe, we have known a cataclysmic phenomenon – a migratory invasion that, my friends, we are seeing only the beginning of today.”

Le Pen, who is standing as MEP for the south-east seat, added: “This massive immigration risks producing a real replacement of populations if we don’t arrive in power soon enough to put an end to the politics of decadence that has been followed for decades.”

He said that religion added an “aggravating factor” to this problem because many immigrants were Muslim and Islam had a “conquering vocation … and even more conquering when it feels strong and they feel numerous”


I have always found it odd that there are such crazy people in politics. It is also interesting that he never mentioned the politics of how certain demographics get medical access and don’t. What is also interesting is that it’s a former colonial power talking about an immigration problem. I reported a few months ago about how 14 African countries are obliged by France, trough a colonial pact, to put 85% of their foreign reserve into France central bank under French minister of Finance control. Until now, 2014, Togo and about 13 other African countries still have to pay colonial debt to France. African leaders who refuse are killed or victim of coup.

Untitled Those who obey are supported and rewarded by France with lavish lifestyle while their people endure extreme poverty, and desperation.

It’s such an evil system even denounced by the European Union, but France is not ready to move from that colonial system which puts about 500 billions dollars from Africa to its treasury year in year out.

We often accuse African leaders of corruption and serving western nations interests instead, but there is a clear explanation for that behavior. They behave so because they are afraid the be killed or victim of a coup. They want a powerful nation to back them in case of aggression or trouble. But, contrary to a friendly nation protection, the western protection is often offered in exchange of these leaders renouncing to serve their own people or nations’ interests. African leaders would work in the interest of their people if they were not constantly stalked and bullied by colonial countries.

In fact, during the last 50 years, a total of 67 coups happened in 26 countries in Africa, 16 of those countries are french ex-colonies, which means 61% of the coups happened in Francophone Africa.

This seems to be blatant hypocrisy. You can read more about this here

 Former French President Jacques Chirac recently spoke about the African nations money in France banks. Here is a video of  him speaking about the french exploitation scheme. He is speaking in French, but here is a short excerpt transcript: “We have to be honest, and acknowledge that a big part of the money in our banks come precisely from the exploitation of the African continent.”