Mini-RANT || The War on Christmas

Every time I think about the so-called War on Christmas here in the USA, I cannot help thinking about Christmas, the stripper I ‘met’ at a bachelor party a while back. Like many strippers she was quite beautiful. However it was her honesty that really pulled me in, by the cheap tie I was wearing; she told me I was handsome, and that none of the money she was making was going toward college tuition.

Im just putting this here for a place holder.

Im just putting this here for a place holder.

While I am not an expert in strippers, Christmas’ most valuable asset was in fact her assets. As many of us reflected later (probably not as eloquently) Christmas was probably the reason that the word callipygian came into being. You may be asking yourself what does the War on Christmas, (the media war, not the actual pin the donkey on the tail variant we all played with Christmas later) have to do with Strippers?

I was faced a similar conundrum during the bachelor party when I tried to figure out if Christmas was in fact,wearing a thong as Shawty proceeded to “get low low low low low low low low”. Suffice it to say that there is as much of a war on Christmas, as there was any visible bits of her thong during her rhythmic interpretation of Flo Rida‘s chart topping song: Apple Bottom Jeans.  For those of you who do not get subtlety, wedging three strings of floss between two Christmas hams egregiously sandwiched together is an insult to the concept of separation.

Screen-Shot-2013-11-12-at-11.12.51-AMThe War on Christmas is just another jingoistic invective couched in the lobotomised images of a holiday celebrating commercial excesses of capitalism. You know how I know, well George Washington attacked Hessian (German) mercenaries on the day after Christmas during the Battle of Trenton on December 26, 1776.

We have gotten it wrong all these years, we should wage War on Christmas. We should take George Washington’s example and attack our future enemies. Luckily according to mass media we should attack: Muslim, Sikhs, country’s where everyone’s skin tone is consistently darker than Rashida Jones. We do not need to attack the Chinese, it seems their government is doing too good a job of exterminating innocents.

In the Treaty of Tripoli signed at Tripoli on November 4, 1796, and at Algiers on January 3, 1797 states:

As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion,—as it has in itself no character of enmity against the laws, religion, or tranquility, of Mussulmen [Muslims],—and as the said States never entered into any war or act of hostility against any Mahometan [Mohammedan] nation, it is declared by the parties that no pretext arising from religious opinions shall ever produce an interruption of the harmony existing between the two countries.

While there are people who will waste time arguing about separation of church and state, I will tell you that there is no war on Christmas. There are just some people who feel uncomfortable with diversity. If parents do not want their kids praying and their elected officials pass laws stopping prayer in public school, that’s just democracy in action not an attack on Christian Morals.

Guardian readers views on US foreign policyWe took the Christ out long time ago. America has no moral fibre; look at the ever-growing poverty in the country, our toppling democratic governments, spying on our neighbours, native American genocide, slavery, how we let corporation exert such strong influence over our democracy, the gradual erosion of civil liberties, all the attention we paid to Miley Cyrus in 2013, our turning a blind eye to the Iraqi use of chemical weapons on the Iranians, the death grip the CIA had during the Cold War on Latin America – should I go on?

BaudrillardJPGChristmas is a pawn in another chess game.  It is a symbol, like the Golden Arches, we’ve been conditioned to love. In and of itself, Christmas has no real meaning. I side with Jean Baudrillard on this one Christmas. The Jolly Old St Nick, the Henry Ford inspired Industrial factory at the North Pole (elves have no insurance or worker’s comp) all of these are symbols that are not based in reality, in fact if you follow Baudrillard, these symbols are instrumental in hiding the reality of our times from us. “… our lives are so saturated with the constructs of society that all meaning is being rendered meaningless by being infinitely mutable. “

There will always be on Christmas for me that is neither a symbol or a but a cold hard fact.

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Some thoughts about some of my posts on race relations in America

dave“America is the original version of modernity. We are the dubbed or subtitled version. America ducks the question of origins; it cultivates no origin or mythical authenticity; it has no past and no founding truth. Having known no primitive accumulation of time, it lives in a perpetual present.”

Jean Baudrillard, America

Lately I have been writing a lot about race relations and sharing with you all what things look like from my perspective. I just want to say that I harbour no ill will towards any race gender, etc. We are all a part of some wonderful mosaic that we cannot perceive clearly perhaps because of the distance we are are to it. What I want or endeavour to do, is to put everything on the table like you do on the fourth date just lay down/smack it down right there next to the syrup tray at IHOP. In writing and sharing what I do, I don’t want to make anyone feel bad. I have been on this blog calling myself the greatest patriot of my generation because I accept America and American society for what it is. I accept our history and our current state in the world. I also pay a lot of attention to what’s going on so I don’t get caught up in things which aren’t going to push me forward in life. So I thought I would share some observations with you about a difficult topic, black and white people and how they get along or don’t get along.


In every major city I have been in in the continental united states there are designated places where black and white people  live. The only time we live in the same neighbourhood is when its being gentrified and  and the minorities are being kicked out to turn their own shitty apartments into luxury condos. Which is ironic because  many of the neighbourhood where we live were abandon by white during a mass migration to the suburbs when there was a money surplus

I did not interact much with White People until I went to prep school, and for many of my fellow classmate they did not interact much with any black people at all and probably still don’t outside from DMV workers, cashiers, contact with security guards. When we got familiar with each other  and cool what would always happen was that we would ask each other questions:

What is the hood? Why do they always say this and that in the rap song? Why do you play “We’re not gonna take it so much?” What’s up with white people walking in the city without shoes and sitting on the floor? I didnt understand fight club, what are you so angry about ? Why do black girls tie there hair ? Why are birkenstocks so popular ? Do you really hate white people? Do you really eat cheese sandwiches all day? Why is it bad when we say the N word? What does this slang word mean ? How comes sometimes you speak slang  and other times you speak really differently?  If your grandmother was mulatto who could be mistaken for white, why are you dark ? Do the police really bother you that much? Why are there so many white serial killers ?

We are strangers to each other when you look at it. For many of us we just have past history and current transgressions to go on and that is not promising, there is too much pain there to be honest. Since I read a lot and educate myself a lot on history, all sorts of science there are some conclusions I have come too about black and white interactions that I express here through humour. Humour because a) it makes what I say more palatable and b) I don’t want to get shot or watched more by government for saying what I am saying.

Let me give you some examples of humour that makes a statement


Scenario: Imagine for a moment every time you say a person from your own race on TV and they were depicted as violent, ignorant, criminal. There were no hero that looked like you, at best you could be a subservient side kicked who because of street smarts and a hard fucked up life could help the main character navigate through places he couldn’t you may notice that something is up. Every culture every ethnic group has their own language which encapsulate their own unique way of seeing things. But the language you use isn’t your own language. Every culture has a its own myth that help form a bond through time between the generations, you dont have any myths, you don’t even know where you come from literally? Add to it that when you go outside the police always question you, look through your stuff, some people call you nigger, or throw change at you, or some women say things like  I couldn’t bring you home to my parents so we have to meet in secret, or I am not attracted to (insert adj here) people, you start to notice that shit got real.

Joke: ON SNL Jamie Foxx talked about Django unchained and how it was so cool to shoot white people. I’m paraphrasing but there was immediate negative response. The idea was that if a white person had talked about shoot black people in a movie and how cool it was  they would be fired.

The Reality: Trayvon Martin or episodes of police brutality.

While we operate under the idea that we are all equal legally in America, it’s not always true. and Socially that never happens. A black man in America does not stand on equal ground with a white man in many ways. That’s just how it is.

I couldn’t imagine a black neighbourhood watch guy chase down and shoot a white kid  armed with skittles and for it to go down how it did. The joke was an important joke that needed to be said. Ive never seen a mainstream  blockbuster movie with a black hero, let alone a black slave The following movie doesn’t count.


Actually if you look at it less than a100 years ago lynching were legal and cool to the point that the whole town was invite and photographs of the deceased were turned into post cards and mailed to friends. The general consensus most Americans would say was that: That was a hundred years get over it ! but that statement doesn’t really deal with or address the complexity of the situation. What matters now is the present because it absolves any sense of responsibility for the past and how the past continues in strange ways today. The point of the joke to me is that we are not on equal grounds. I do not know any black people that wants to kill random white people, but the past weighs heavy in our relationships.

I will defer you  to Louis C.K


You may be surprised to know that before I post many things I have people look at it and ask if it is ok – will it rustle to many jimmies? etc. It is not my want to make some people feel bad. I just want to share with you my perspective. I’m just putting it down on the table, showing you what I am working with, with a little bit of humor, because at the end of the day we are all human beings and I think to really make a change in things, in life, you have to be willing to talk and listen and share. I write each post from the ambiance of friendship as dorky as that sounds.

Ok that’s it



Reflections on Disney’s Recent Acquisition of LucasFilm (1)

Mass media exerts a powerful influence on our lives. There are many instances where the media’s stereotypical portrayal of certain people, places or things can influence whole demographics sometimes times for the betters other times more often than not for the worse. To give an example: The Yale Political Quarterly published an article by Stephen Balkaran called “Mass Media and Racism. His opens his article with the following words:

Mass media have played and will continue to play a crucial role in the way white Americans perceive African-Americans. As a result of the overwhelming media focus on crime, drug use, gang violence, and other forms of anti-social behavior among African-Americans, the media have fostered a distorted and pernicious public perception of African-Americans. The history of African-Americans is a centuries old struggle against oppression and discrimination. The media have played a key role in perpetuating the effects of this historical oppression and in contributing to African-Americans’ continuing status as second-class citizens.

With that said I have been thinking about Walt Disney‘s acquisition of many iconic companies: Marvel Comics, Pixar and most recently LucasFilms. To me this acquisition paints a very scary prospect.

More Reflections on Mass Media

As it stands now five major companies (Time Warner, VIACOM, Vivendi Universal, Walt Disney and News Corp) own about 95% of all mass media including theme parks, movie studios, television and radio broadcast networks and programming, video news, sports entertainment, telecommunications, wireless phones, video games software, electronic media and music companies. What we see everyday through the media channels doesn’t happen by accident. There are board rooms plastered with statistics telling compiled for the record executives telling them what is “in”, telling them what is popular and ultimately what will make them the most money.

I often ask myself what fraction of what I perceive and how I act a product of the constant and nearly ubiquitous subliminal advertising of mass media? How many real moments are there today – now before we receive any information, it is teased, shaped and presented to us a certain way. How the media choses to report on the news as the recent Presidential debates illustrated is just as important and in some cases maybe more important than the debates themselves. Jean Baudrillard in describing the current post-modern state has said:

“The real is produced from miniaturized cells, matrices, and memory banks, models of control — and it can be reproduced an indefinite number of times from these. It no longer needs to be rational, because it no longer measures itself against either an ideal or negative instance. It is no longer anything but operational.”

This means that at some point in the past there were real moments and they happened when people “real” moment occurred when:

  1. A person experienced another person’s presence and speech, or
  2. Observed something that was happening in the neighborhood or across the street.

Today what we experience belongs increasing, almost asymptotically, to borrow a term from mathematics, falls under the realm  spectacles, images, symbols, signs.  We have become really dependent on technology. For many people I know it would be very stressful to not have access to TV, Internet, lap-top or personal computer, radio, tablet, smart phone.  I think for many of us myself included without this we would feel cut off and disconnected which is ironic. I say it is ironic because there is still life outside of technology. How many of the 6 billion people in the world have access to the internet and smart phones and tablets etc? Yeah they don’t feel divorced from life or living. While technology can open humanity up to new unexplored worlds and experiences it can be a tool of oppression and disenfranchisement.

But it is important to realize that technology carries with it culture. Langdon Winner has illustrated in his writings that as technology becomes more and more woven into the texture of everyday existence the device, techniques and systems we adopt shed their tool like qualities to become part of humanity. The very act of using the kinds of machines, techniques, and systems available to use generates patterns of activities and expectations that soon become “second nature”. I remember the philosopher Karl Jaspers had a fear that we were inching closer towards a technocracy which meant for him that human beings were gradually being reduced to tools of scientific or ideological goals. Sometimes I wonder if this to an extent hasn’t already happened?

” as we compare our own mind and operation of a computer, we acknowledge  that an understanding of technical devices has somehow merged with the most intimate level of self-understanding.”
-Landgon Winner , PReface of the Whale and the Reactor


When Disney comes up I think of

The crows in Dumbo,(Get the Jim CROW reference)

Dumbo is a 1941 American animated film produced by Walt Disney and released on October 23, 1941


Uncle Remus

Walt Disney‘s Song of the South, released in 1946. The film was a combination of live action and animation


There are many Disney Heroines who have no mother and are raised by father alone. There are the native Americans depicted in an stereotypical way in Peter Pan.  King Louie in the Jungle Book, a book written by Kipling, the same author who wrote the White Man’s burden. Finally who can forget the barbaric portrayal of “Agraba” in Aladin: “Where they cut off your ear if they don’t like your face, it’s barbaric but hey it’s home” I wonder what this all means for us as a nation that supposed to be a cultural melting pot, I wonder what I means for our democracy.

I have more to say but I’m sleepy, cya tomorrow




Adele had a baby boy ‎(‘-‘ ) (._. ) (._. ) ( ‘-‘ ) (._.) ( ‘-‘) MrMary looks for some fucks to give

Everyday 490,000 mother’s give birth, why is Adele’s baby important? Why is her vagina-spawn breaking news?

! Do you know what’s there, waiting beyond that beach? Immortality! Take it! It’s yours!

Adele can sing but so what…. so can the neighborhood cats when there fucking in the alleyway with the reckless abandon of a cocaine addict sucking dick for their next fix or like a 19 year old couple that managed to filch extra lube from a 24/hour Rite-Aid/CVS/Savon/Duane Reade/Jean Coutu on Rue Jean Talon in Montreal.  Don’t get me wrong, she has a great voice and when chicks are over I play that stuff to set them at ease, to let them know I will be gentle first before I dig them out like my pockets when I get home after work. But does that change the fact that her baby will be another spoiled non-contributing ass-clown. [Yes I called it!!!]

Why do we Celebrate celebrities ?

I have my own theories why we love celebrities so much that we support an industry devoted to filling our minds with useless information about them with our hard-earned money. I believe to quote my homey Jean Baudrillard:

“We live in a world where there is more and more information, and less and less meaning.” 
― Jean BaudrillardSimulacra and Simulation

We are living in a  time were life itself is devoid of the experience of living. We live to work we have no time for family or to sit quietly with ourselves. We have 4 weeks out of 52 to take a vacation to vacate from the trappings and concerns of the day to day. (I have to say that I’ve never seen a job that actually allows you to take all your four weeks off). I feel we live at least in the West a highly artificial life where  we just go through the motions. These things like jobs / drinking bullshit coffee at Starbucks / wearing fucking over-priced turtle necks while pretending to read books too obtuse for us to understand are supposed to give meaning to our existence but they really do not. I kind of think, and it may be because my mind is damaged, that  if the American dream were really all it was cracked up to be there would not be the  mid-life crisis which really for a lot of people that I have met and know personally is terribly real experience. So as a society we worship these celebrity fucks who we secret desire to be like.

But Wait there more: Illegitimate child

Adele was not and isn’t married and that is sort of taboo in  the 21st century. Why is it taboo I don’t fucking know.  I think one needs to live with and have ton of sex with your significant other before you sign on the dotted line. We all have been in a situation where we purchased some stuff and then  took it home and  it all was not what we wanted or expected. But anyways  some people are  saying she should be married and all that. Personally I don’t know what’s right or wrong I’m not a judge or jury, but I can tell  you this:

MrMary’s reasons why you should get married after kids

After the ceremony and the honey moon is over sex becomes non-existent except, if you’re a man, on your birthday. On your bday you will get a lazy hand-job that you have to not only orchestrate, direct, provide the lighting for, but also take part in to finish. After having a baby, sex becomes a fictitious aspiration you don’t even get horrible bday action. You my friend are going to revisit those post-puberty years where pornography was a way of life. I say combine both horrors and the let down will be easier. Enjoy the rod-ramming & taco-filling,  as much as possible and then rip the band-aid off and re-introduce yourself to the silent desperation that made you masturbate ferociously to pictures of Robyn Givens while listening to Man-o-War in the background.

Also after the first year of having a kid you will get to see how your significant other (male or female doesn’t matter) is  under stress, with lack of sleep, without make-up, etc Some people under stress are more  demons then they are human beings.

Bottom Line

I am happy Adele gave birth to a healthy baby. I’m happy mom and baby are both are both healthy. I wish kid and mom all the best but after all that is said and done


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My Responce to people who disliked my making fun of Felix Baumgartner’s epic fall

Judging from the email messages I got, I seemed to have pissed some people off by my sarcastic statement wondering why Felix Baumgartner is considered athlete. I thought I would share a few words.

First off, to appease everyone who contacted me I cannot do what Felix Baumgartner did today, it took training, time, and money that I don’t have his act today is definitely a record of some sort. The event though was a symbolic of something the same way Neil Armstrong first step on the moon was. My sarcasm was directed at what the event to me symbolized.

The word athlete comes from the word athlete from Greek athlētēs, from athlein to contend for a prize, from athlon prize, contest. What is the prize here? The prize here is to have one’s name written in the history book. Jesse Owen winning 4 Olympic gold medals at the Olympic games that Hitler presided over was an athletic feat that made a statement. I can say the same for Billie Jean King‘s beat-down of Bobby Riggs at tennis. Those feat were greater than any single man or country.

Felix jump isn’t on par to me with those events. It’s a vainglorious feat I don’t see high school boys and girls petitioning their school to let them free fall from a balloon 25 miles up. This feat in terms of inaccessibility is comparable to the first manned hot air balloon flight in 1783 (6 years before the start of the French Revolution) by Jean-François Pilâtre de Rozier who hobnobbed with the Parisian aristocracy and if I remember correctly was close friend with the brother of the king of France. de Rozier wasn’t a French peasant begging for bread I believe. Neither was Felix

Felix tried the jump once before but the wind conditions were not good. That one time use giant balloon/air condom cost an estimated $250,000: no estimate have been release for the total cost of his amazing attempt. Self-referentiality is an expensive past-time and now a sport it seems. This sets a precedent to me at least that if you want to prove to yourself that you are special and have money you can buy the world as your audience. (There is an industry built on this space tourism, Sarah Brightman is going to go to the international Space station to be the first person to sing there) This is very different from the Jesse Owen track and field gold medal.

Many people uttered the platitude that Felix’s jump brought many people together. I wondered who did he bring together when 65% of the world according to some estimates does not have INTERNET access. I am willing to guess that a large majority of the world doesn’t have cable TV, or have not benefited from Direct TV (it’s a shame especially with the NFL Sunday Ticket). Usually after 10 minutes of programming there is a 2-3 minute commercial time. I’m sure while many people were watching Baumgartner fall some had the luxury to have a fridge with food to go raid. This isn’t the majority of the world I don’t think and Baumgartners fall isn’t marketable to most of the world.

I guess at the end of the day I let my cynicism and curmudgeonly ways get the best of me and didn’t join in the festivities. Felix Baumgartner is an international hero and like the EU is deserving of a major international prize. 

“…sense of futility that comes from doing anything merely to prove to yourself that you can do it: having a child, climbing a mountain, making some sexual conquest, committing suicide.

The marathon is a form of demonstrative suicide, suicide as advertising: it is running to show you are capable of getting every last drop of energy out of yourself, to prove it… to prove what? That you are capable of finishing. Graffiti carry the same message. They simply say: I’m so-and-so and I exist! They are free publicity for existence.
Do we continually have to prove to ourselves that we exist? A strange sign of weakness, harbinger of a new fanaticism for a faceless performance, endlessly self-evident.” 

– Jean Baudrillard

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