I remember going on a date one day. When I met the lady in question outside the chosen restaurant I told her upfront: “Listen, I’m not going to spend any money on you, or incur debt to feed you tonight.” She didn’t seem to happy when I told her that I had taken 6 month vow of not paying for shit for anyone else. All in all, at least we were on equal terms she wasn’t going to put out, well that part of herself and I wasn’t going to put out my $$$.
I want to share with you my observations on dating and the power dynamic between men and women on dates, but before that I wanted to tell you about something interesting that happened in Israel not to long ago, aside from the massacre of Palestinians. Did you know that the Israeli kibbutzim are to many evidence of innate masculine and feminine characteristics ?
Gather Round for a Gender Difference Story
The Kibbutzim were were founded as farming communities in the late nineteenth century under the influence of Marxist ideals. Men and women were viewed not only as equal, but as inherently the same. In the fields, women worked the same long hours as the men. In the kitchens, nurseries, and children’s dormitories men worked the same long hours as the women. As the years passed, however, an unexpected development occurred. Slowly the women left the fields, the traditional areas of men’s work. More and more they specialized in the work of the kitchen, nurseries, and dormitories. Gradually, the men specialised in the field work. Against the enormous pressure of kibbutz ideology most men and women sorted themselves into “traditional” gender specific roles.
Did you know that some anthropologist believed that our gender roles gave us an evolution advantage over our Neanderthal competitors. Supposedly and the research is still out, Neanderthal men and women hunted side by side. Neanderthal women were truly equals to their male counterparts, not just in family court.
Where does that Leave us ?
Somewhere about 50,000 to a 100,000 years ago these sex based roles emerged in our species. That’s a significant amount of time for a habit to become deeply ingrained not only in our culture but also in our behaviors. Now we come to the dating and why shit seems more difficult than it has to be. I have seen that in our culture our body, mind and psychology are out of synch with each other. What that means to me is contradictions galore. Case and point:
Why Strong, Independent Women Just Want to Be Taken Care of (Sometimes)
I would like to explore the idea that mature, confident, independent women do sometimes face the catch-22 of wanting to be strong in the world while wanting to be ‘taken care of’ — and not just sexually — in romantic relationships. That is, some women want to be completely respected for their capabilities and strength of character while also wanting to be led, supported and cared for emotionally, socially and yes, sometimes even economically when they are with a man.
I see a kind of arc growing, I have been talking about marriage and human relationships. I guess now I want to continue talking about some gender differences and their consequences. I want to talk about stuff in real way, based on what I have seen, and my own experiences. Not according to a buncha fucking books, theories and self-righteous horse-shit I don’t for a second believe. From what I gather you all seem to like me when I being sincere so let’s hit the gas and see what happens