MrMary Reflects || Geishas, Monogamy & Infidelity III

I thought I’d would offer my final thoughts in this, the last installment of this series. A few ideas impacted me as I have been writing this series.

  • Promiscuity is a significant part of primate mating and reproductive behavior. Some speculate that we are by nature designed to be sexual omnivores.
  • As I talked about before marrying for love is a development of the Enlightenment. We have only been doing so for the last 2-300 years. Currently, less than 20 percent of world cultures require monogamy.
  • The popularity of the nuclear family began after the Industrial revolution.
  • The sexual tourism industry is a global phenomenon indulged in by both men and women.
  • Statistics show that the high prevalence of infidelity by both men and women.

I don’t think that monogamy is the society’s one size fits all answer to relationships. I feel that there is a deeper issue at work.

We Distance Ourselves from What We Really Are

man_animalAn ex-gf asked me once what did I think about marriage. I told her that: “I didn’t think it was anything special being that some animals mate for life. There should not be any points given for doing something  animals do.  I don’t get points for shitting in the grass or doing it doggy style, do I?” She didn’t find that funny. Yet I shared that with you to bring up a point. Civilization makes us imagine that we are something higher and more evolved than animals. We have spent centuries denying and suppressing our animal self.  I’m not advocating a descent into savagery. Good mental, emotional, and psychological health is dependent on balancing our animal and spiritual nature. Spirituality isn’t drumming in a park on mushrooms or whatever counts for spirituality nowadays. Let me give you an example. This below is a picture of a recently unearthed, double ended Bronze dildo from the Han Dynasty, it is about 2000 years old.


This was might have been in use around when Jesus was preaching at fish fries, bringing in wine to parties to give you some context. Once we accept both sides of our nature and not promote one at the expense of the other we can come to terms with the reality of relationships. The centuries long suppression of women and our animalistic nature has lead in part to our imbalance.

According to the animal kingdom, monogamy is exceedingly uncommon in the natural world. In fact, with advances in the technology of genetic testing, many of the species previously lauded as being lifelong monogamous, are now known to actually have many sexual encounters outside their seemingly monogamous partnerships. Among mammals, only a very few species live in seemingly monogamous arrangements, and fewer still maintain sexual fidelity within those relationships. Man certainly does not seem to be one of them. There is increasing evidence that many men are not biologically or psychologically disposed to sexual monogamy.

I find it interesting that monogamy and sexual fidelity are not one and the same, for animals and for possibly for human as well.

In closing I think if over half of divorces occur because of infidelity and one in 25 dads unknowingly raise children that they didn’t father then that is cause to rethink some things.



What taboo topic should i run my mouth about next?


  1. Ever consider that from a radical Christian perspective, the point of monogamy is precisely that it is so “unnatural” and, if undertaken rightly, creates an equality not found in triangles etc.? (Radical, in this case, gets beyond some of the male/female inequalities imposed by Paul and the like.)


    • Hola Jnana,

      It’s nice to see ya. Hope you are well and are enjoying the first days of spring!

      I was wondering if you could further explain what you mean? I’m not sure I understand. Radical Christianity here is one that doesn’t follow St. Paul’s views as expressed in Corinthians and the supposed inferiority of women thing attributed to him in the verses of Timothy? And the point is that its unnaturalness in teh right context establishes an equality ?


  2. Ohhh, so many topics!

    Gay marriage vs Christian “rights”
    Benevolent sexism
    The “patriarchy”
    Pickup artist culture
    Republicans vs democrats
    Militant vegans vs meat pushers
    Recreational drug use
    Gender roles
    Transsexuals vs cis people culture
    Ethnocentric beliefs
    Religion vs spirituality
    Morality vs tradition
    Men’s rights
    Reproductive rights
    The male Pill
    Condom use
    Paternity fraud
    Trigger warnings vs just being uncomfortable
    Why circumcision is allowed
    Bdsm practices
    Clothing choices between men & women


    • Hola TarnsZ,

      That’s a lot of cool topics to pic from lately I have been thinking about the whole alpha beta designation and why I feel it does more harm than good. I wanted to do a comical thing on dating and the consequences of the gender roles. I can do a religion versus spirituality one as well. I had some other dude-shit kinda stuff I wanted to poke fun at. I dunno how to choose between them though Ill figure it out great topics though this was awesome!!!!


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