Epic Rant || Americans and Justin Bieber

Hola Mi Gente,

Recently Justin Bieber has caught the ire of a subset of the American populace that can be best described by the phrase “amnesic hypocrites”. His latest in a string of public offenses involves licking and or sucking on a stripper’s nipples. While I don’t mean to get off on a rant here, can’t we all agree that nipples were designed by evolution, for the very purpose of being sucked on? What else was he supposed to do with a strippers nipple ? Use it for math calculations like one would an abacus.

Here is a math problem Justin should have done with the strippers nipple provided he had a calculator nearby: 6922251 * 8 = old immature highschool joke that guys anywhere from 12 to 37 find funny.

According to a 2013 study published by Bitdefender, a security technology company that also offers parental control solutions, kids start watching porn online from as early as age 6 and begin flirting on the Internet from the age of 8.  The study, “Kids and Online Threats”, was conducted from over 19,000 parents worldwide. I saw pornographic images at age 6 but that was because I walked in on my parents seeking retribution on each other.

Don’t you remember how much of a little shit you were at 19?  Now imagine you have millions of dollars, fame, a crew, and legion of people young and old that want to fuck you? I’m surprised he’s not snorting lines of cocaine of a midget’s anus  while wearing an Easter Bunny suit with a steel dildo hanging from his neck.

The people who are complaining the loudest about Justin Bieber are the ones who seem to forget that our teen years were a grave yard for common sense and public decency. Those  who are so outraged believe that people work to become famous in order to be a shining light in the collective soul-darkness, guiding those with an egregious lack of initiative into action. This is bullshit of course. Look at this comment:

Mostly I could care less what Bieber does as long as no one is hurt. But I work with kids and so many little girls love him and he is so unworthy of their admiration. While I understand that pop stars shouldn’t be roll models and I don’t have a solution but some how I do think if your fan base is made up of children you should behave yourself in public 

Let’s cut the fucking shit. Our politicians don’t behave in public and neither do we. Was there ever a time in history  where human beings were known for behaving in public? Have you walked the streets on New Years Day. There are more shriveled-up, rank genitals on the street on New Years Eve then there were at the geriatric ward where I volunteered.  I bet 80% of you reading this have at one time been that drunk friend that just destroyed your friend’s faith in humanity by some pathetic public display.

Who is worthy of anyone’s admiration? No One!

And more importantly who are these fucking kids that look up to Justin as a role model. I’ve yet to meet kids that dumb. Are these the same kids that find middle aged-men guys with beady eyes, a neat white-collar, and a vestry so irresistibly attractive? Kids look up to Bieber because he was extricated from the slaughter of innocence by wealth. While it wasn’t Holden Caufield, someone pulled Justin Bieber away from the cliff at the end of that field of rye. The rest will, like we did many years earlier, march slowly to the edge of the precipice accompanied by the cries of children falling into the River Lethe we call adulthood.

If at 19 you can be drafted into a war I think consensual nipple sucking, inclusive of your friends is fine.  Would we have been upset if we saw pictures of his gassing a village, hurling grenades at wedding in Yemen or Iraq? Plus what better image is there to start black history month than young black and white adults coming together to suck at the nipples of a voluptuous stripper?

Dr King would see this as progress.

*In no way do I support Bieber or his music!