Satire || Telling Boys Not to be Girly Isn’t Always Bad


It’s like sitting on a picket fence, or riding a bicycle without a seat. I’m referring to supporting women’s rights while not aligning myself with feminism. When my feminist friend recently complained that men have all the rights and abuse the power they have usurped from a centuries long campaign against women, I told her that: ” I do have a very particular set taken-kidnapping-sceneof skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for men like these.” I vowed to help her find these men and hopefully after we corner them I could get some rights too?

Then I asked how would women of color like my sister, or my hijab wearing friend  Khadijah fare in this new epoch of equality ? In a world with men and women on complete equal footing would there be divisive class struggl?. Would neocolonialism and imperialistic attitudes still rule our foreign policy? But like free clinic, she had no answers for me, at least until this coming Tuesday after 2pm.

I read an article written by a feminist that made me die a little inside. I admire the attempt but it was fucking horrible. It tastes like the $0.99 slice of pizza I bought once when I was broke at this Hindustani Kebab place. I admire their enthusiasm and willingness to go  out of their comfort-zone but it was shit.

The real boy crisis: 5 ways America tells boys not to be “girly”

Mocking boys for doing “feminine” things leaves them ill-equipped for life,
and makes America a worse place for all 

The initiation of young boys into to males is a complex psychological and sociological event and has been for thousands of years. The oldest cave paintings in Altamira and Lascaux were the site of male initiations into the mystery of life. What this tells me is that at least for 17,300 years, about 13,300 years before the rise of Patriarchy (~4000BC) in Ancient times, the issue of male initiation was important to the community.

When I read sentences like: ” The process of “becoming a man” still often means rejecting almost any activity or preference that smacks of cross-gender expression or sympathy” the first thing I want to ask is what to this women, comprises the process of becoming a man. I think this is a valid question and isn’t a sexist one. As I go further into the  article I get the feeling that the author is just going by what she has read and not the reality of things. For example look at this quote:

Expression and empathy are closely related for children. When boys are taught that they can’t “be like girls” it has the threefold effect. First, it alienates them from core aspects of themselves. Second, it portrays what is feminine as undesirable and inferior. Third, it forces boys into a “man box” from which emotions and empathy are excluded.  An upcoming documentary, “The Mask You Live In,” carefully examines, from the perspective of boys and men, what this feels like and means in their lives. 

I don’t speak for all men, but being taught I cannot be like a girl didn’t alienate me from myself, or portray the feminine as undesirable or inferior. Thirdly there was no man box. I didn’t get acquainted with the man-box till I had my first girlfriend, but by then all the time in the man-box made me a better and more confident person. But getting back there were things that girls did, and there were things that guys did. When I asked why I was told that was tradition.The beauty of the extended family and of being a part of a community is that every man I met was a unique expression of masculinity and every women was a manifestation of femininity. We were on the basis of our humanity equal, the roles we played were different. I will have of course more to say on this but I cannot help myself; I have to poke some fun so  here is my satirical

3 ways not being “girly” helps American men

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1 _ Suicide

Men are much more effective at killing themselves than women. They tend to use much more violent methods. If I had the stomach for it … I mean … Is there a better more effective way of getting out of college loan and credit card debt, and having to marry someone simply because you’ve been dating and having a good time for more than 18 months? Camus was wrong , suicide isn’t the only truly serious philosophical problem it’s the best debt solution and means of marriage annulment.

2 _ Playing Dodgeball

When we used to play dodge ball as a class all the girls would stay  anchored to the ground in some corner talking about the notes they wrote to each other in pig latin. Terrible move! Not playing dodgeball like a girl has kept me from getting blasted in the face. Funnily enough, the only two contexts where it is ok to get blasted in the face are in dodgeball and porn which sets an interesting precedence for skin care I suppose.

3 _ Locker-Room Bathroom Usage

I have cleaned both the male and female locker room bathrooms. Holy Shit! When I say Holy-Shit it isn’t me swearing but rather it my feeble attempt to explain the how shit got places it did inside the Women’s locker room.  Ah that Friday locker room/bathroom clean-up duty, every time there was always one stall that looked like a cophrophiliac murderers handiwork.

2 thoughts on “Satire || Telling Boys Not to be Girly Isn’t Always Bad

    1. Thanks for your comment and for re-blogging this! You are from Finland ? I saw on your blog you live in Lappland at the moment?

      I wonder why in the US in particular masculinity and femininity have such problems. A lot of time I see people who want to say that there is little to no distinction between them and that all is permissible and then I see others describing the two as being so separate and disparate that there cannot be even a dialogue between the two.


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