Jocular Look @ Today’s News || Using Porn to Cope w/ Sport Team Loses


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For Boston Bruins fans, the second worst thing about losing the Stanley Cup is that hockey is over for the next three months. So how are they supposed to fill those empty hours? With porn, apparently. The good people at http://www.PornHub.com studied website analytics during Game 6 on Monday night, and, from 8 p.m. to 11 p.m. EDT, traffic was way down in both Boston and Chicago. But about the time the Blackhawks took the Stanley Cup for a victory lap, visits to the porn site from the Boston area increased by 21 percent. If not winning a title means you’re watching porn, 90 percent of the site’s year-round visitors must be from Cleveland.

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Getting Into It

Q. Why do ducks fly over Boston upside down?
A. There’s nothing worth crapping on!

I have been to Boston many times and am not surprised at this news. There’s not much you can do with a Charlie card, loose morals and a free evening in Boston.I was born and raised in NYC where there are tons of things to do after 9pm aside from paying for illicit sexual activity – on a side note due the recession and overwhelming demand a tower of power, single or mixed gender cost much less than it did in ’85.

2009-03-02-rachaelRayFHM5Whenever I am in Boston I feel unusually depressed . I think Boston and its infectiously vapid ambiance makes it denizens invest  what little energy they they have to keep from killing themselves into their lacklustre sports team. Of course when they don’t win, the Bostonian penchant for misery expresses itself as obsessive masturbation. I know the feeling especially on those late night where all alone I find myself on a TV station with Rachel Ray coquettishly talking about meat in that raspy husky voices of her.

New Rule: Dont shake anyone’s hand from Boston after one of their teams lost, and dont be surprised at the number of tube socks youll see in teh laundromat at the end of that week.

 

One thought on “Jocular Look @ Today’s News || Using Porn to Cope w/ Sport Team Loses

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