Jocular Look @ Today’s news || Get your ballots ready: Octomom is nominated for 4 ‘porn Oscars’


F279A4C68E4C83809FCDD439BB289_h231_w308_m5_cdrnQvlovAdding to her list of what we will generously term “achievements,” Nadya Suleman, better known by her Batman villain-esque nickname Octomom, has been nominated for four Adult Video Network awards! AVN awards are considered the “Oscars of porn,” and to be a four-time nominee and mother of 14 has to be some kind of first. Suleman said she is “very excited” to attend the awards ceremony. (Let’s not get into how excited, please.) The film she was nominated for, called “Home Alone,” features Suleman being very, very excited while a laundry line full of baby clothes dries behind her and was described by actual porn star Amber Peach as “disturbing.” [Source]

MrMary Weighs In

Having had 80 fingers inside her at the same time I knew it was only a matter of time before the Octomom ventured into porn. But to be nominated for a porn award on her first movie is really interesting to me. When a group of self-congratulatory jerkoffs (actually this is not a porn – maybe I should pen a script for it)  get together to congratulate each other for  jobs (blow, hand or any other kind of job)  well done, and give each other awards that will cement their legacy in the cum-stained annals of human history generally I turn off the TV and wait till the Oscars/Golden Globes/Emmy’s are over to watch the evening news.

indexWhen other porn actress describe your first masturbation movie as disturbing there is much cause for alarm. Actually Ms Peach said: “The whole video from a porn standpoint just looks awkward and uncomfortable.” Logically this doesnt makes sense; videos  like 2 girls one cup was not awkward and uncomfortable but some scary ghoulish figure masturbating during a laundry run is? I call bullshit!  I didnt know who was Amber Peach so I decided to unfortunately look her up online. From the stretch marks on the corner of her mouth and being the star of such titles Ms Peach is the real deal (check out her Internet Movie DataBase (IMDB PAGE)

  1. 12 Nasty Girls Masturbating 11
  2. The Sphincter Chronicles
  3. Girl Pirates 2
  4. Juicy White Anal Booty! 2
  5. Black Cock Face Fuckers

So on the basis of experience and industry cred I have to take Ms Peach on her word. But nevertheless I am happy for the Octomom she has been through a lot this year.  She got over a Xanax addiction. sHE  dodged both  allegations of child abuse and  potential legal battles at strip clubs. Now to be nominated for four Adult Video Network award nominations is a gift.

  1. Best Celebrity Sex Tape
  2. Best Solo Releae
  3. Best DVD Extras
  4. Best Marketing Campaign

And they say Christmas comes only once a year, bullshit! Not for the Octomom and not for the stars of such Holiday Adult Films like:

Here Cumz Santa (2005)

All I Want For Christmas Is a Gang Bang (1994)

Christmas Cums Early (1997)

Miracle on 69th Street (2008)

Silent Night: Hardcore for the Holidays (2006)

The Tits that Saved Christmas (2003)

Naughty Or Nice She’s Getting It Twice (2008)

3 thoughts on “Jocular Look @ Today’s news || Get your ballots ready: Octomom is nominated for 4 ‘porn Oscars’

  1. OMG, what would we do without your news, McMary? I just experienced streams of . . . laughter over those Christmas titles. Have you heard the Dr. Seuss porn titles? They were on Letterman’s top ten and included “Wham, Bam, Sam I Am.”

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  2. I have to scrub my eyeballs again. (And not because there were balls in my eyes.) I could live my whole life without thinking about Octomom masturbating to laundry (but rest assured that the unpleasant task of laundry now has even more repulsion for me) or without reading another porn movie title. Good God, I can’t even think of a single item in the laundry room that would make for good sexy time. The lint roller sounds like a device of torture. I have to go shut the laundry room door now…

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