Jocular Look @ Today’s News || Greece is the world leader in penis enlargement surgeries

Plastic surgery procedures are increasingly common in our looks-obsessed world, but the features people opt to have “fixed” vary depending on what country they’re from. The U.S. is still No. 1 in terms of the sheer number of procedures performed, but information the Economist gathered from a market-research firm breaks down how the rest of the world keeps itself beautiful. In Brazil, buttock operations are seven times more common than in other countries. But Greece takes the award for the most, um, compensatory procedure. Penis enlargements are done 10 times more often there than in the rest of the world. Given its incapability of maintaining a virile economy, perhaps Greece simply needs an ego boost.

MrMary Weighs in

[DISCLAIMER: There may be some comments in here that are inappropriate.
I am just kidding & mean no disrespect. I can’t pass up such an opportunity]

It’s not bad enough that  Greece has severe financial problems. In order to address these problems there needs to be an independent team of researchers working hard to figure out what’s going on.  In this case someone needs to ask an important question:
Why are Greek Men getting this procedure and what age/demographic are they?

Why The procedure

There are only two reason I can think of:

  1. Excess consumption of Spinach and feta cheese increases vagina size.  If this is true there are no longer any sugar walls in Greece more like an imported cane sugar warehouse.
  2. This has always been an issue from ancient times to now. If so then there is a solution: anal sex. Supposedly  judging from my prostate exam this is a case where excess size and girth is an impediment to functioning normally in society as one’s ability to sit, eat the $5 foot-long as subway tie one’s shoes is compromised. It also seems that Greeks and anal have  a long history: Greeks and anal sex  go together like well to be honest Greek and anal sex. I was going to say  peanut butter and jelly but that would paint a bad picture.

Practical Solutions to this Problem

  • Greek Women or gay guys or sheep can feed the men there the same tired old line that its not the size but the motion of the Ocean, and of course there would be no greater irony if that was said as Greece is  a nation of 1000’s of island with all its inhabitants attuned to the motions of the sea.
  • Men can get their spouses/sex partners to sign a permission slip saying that will flip over, and take one for Greece. All the money sued for the surgeries can be use to mitigate some of the austerity measures that are and will be enacted on Greece
  • We can impose a ban on feta cheese, and baby spinach consumption as well as Moussaka and other common Greek Food through.Eventually we can use statistics to tell us which food when we ban stopped the vagina enlarging epidemic

See that  3 easy solutions just like that but check out what the commenter had to say:

 Why do men think that they need to cater to women with enormous, stretched out vaginas?  Do guys even think about that?  Women that crave the big ones are that way for a reason, they have jammed everything they can get their hands on in there, and stretched the hell out of it.  Some women are born with huge vaginas, just like some guys are born with huge penises, they are both not normal, they are in the vast minority.  I’m not ripping on the naturally large vagina women, they can seek all the salami their hearts desire, but guys who dream of being able to pleasure whores and vagina obsessed nymphos is stupid!  I’ve been with a few, and I’m an average sized guy in the penis department, it’s like throwing a hot dog down a hallway hahaha, I didn’t feel bad for me, I felt bad for THEM!!!  Who wants a woman like that???  They’ve gone and wrecked what the good lord gave them.  If they’d stop shoving things in there for 10 seconds maybe they’d realize there’s more to life than a stretched out vagina.  Straight nasty!!!

If Syria attacks Turkey from behind, would Greece help?

Makes perfect sense….because it is very needed….in most European men and their descendants…ie Americans.  Sorry, but as a woman, I gotta tell the truth….None of that “size doesnt matter” crap.  Because IT DOES!  U need to know y ur women are flocking in DROVES to other races.  That’s why……The only time a woman wants to see a thimble is when she is sewing!

Do you want to super-size your order? Yes please…I’ll take a foot long smothered in underwear! Yes sir…and would you like a pop-tart and a coke-whore with that? Yes please me. Drive up to the second bimbo please.

 If you’ve see the greek statues of antiquity, you know the problem.

Maybe if they had smaller dicks they would all work more.

Finally a Serious Note

“The Greek people are anarchic and difficult to tame. For this reason, we must strike deep into their cultural roots: Perhaps then we can force them to conform. I mean, of course, to strike at their language, their religion, their cultural and historical reserves, so that we can neutralize their ability to develop, to distinguish themselves, or to prevail, thereby removing them as an obstacle to our strategically vital plans in the Balkans, the Mediterranean, and the Middle East, to all this neuralgic territory of great strategic importance for us, for the politics of the USA.”

Henry Kissinger, at the time of the turkish invasion in Cyprus, while addressing a group of Washington, D.C. businessmen in Sept.1974, republished from Turkish Daily News in 1977

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