Great Christmas Gift: Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitzer

Cleanliness is next to godliness which I guess is why there is always some sort of rag in the night stand regardless of gender. Around the holidays being that it is the most wonderful time of the year, you can expect that rag to be soiled and to  also be stiff enough to use as a Frisbee. But don’t worry you can be hygienic and as dirty as you want to be thank to this new product by BlueQ

Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitzer

The Number One After-Genital-Contact Hand Sanitizer. Now kills 99.99% of germs on contact! 2 oz./ 59 ml.

Sometimes the need to toss off or rub one over takes your thinking apparatus and you have to knock a few back. You may have to rush back to your job cooking food,  something involving human beings and contacting them. Luckily two pumps of this sanitizer and you’re good to go right back into work without worry or fear.

For those Tough Messes

Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Liquid Hand Soap

Because, hey, you never know. Better to be safe than sorry. No offense to you specifically, ok? I wash after shaking in general. Shaking hands! I wash after shaking hands. That’s what I meant to say. Fresh Meadow scent with Aloe! 8 oz./ 236 ml

Why does everything  have to smell like Fresh Meadow Scent, Summer’s Eve, Massengil’s and now Genital Touching Hand Sanitizer/Soap.  So now after you use this you will smell like you’ve been douching


4 thoughts on “Great Christmas Gift: Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitzer

  1. Very funny. The whole “cleanliness is next to godliness” has always intrigued me, especially given that I’m an atheist. I made up my own saying, for atheists; “Cleanliness is next to the shower where I wash myself.” By that logic, I’m much cleaner than any person who believes in God, because he’s much further away than my shower.


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