Jocular Look @ Today’s News || Buy A Ring, Get a Gun At North Liberty Business

NORTH LIBERTY, Iowa – An Eastern Iowa jeweler is offering guns to customers who buy an engagement ring before the end of the month. On Thursday Jewelery By Harold, in North Liberty, will kick off the first “buy her a diamond and receive a free hunting riffle.” “Fun is more important than anything else, we try to put some fun in it,” said Harold van Beek, who has owned his own business since last year. “Hunting season is coming up, I thought this is cool, so let’s do something for the boy who doesn’t like to hunt for diamonds, but likes to hunt for deer.” Anyone who buys a diamond ring before October 31 will receive a voucher to pick up a Remington 870 hunting rifle at Fin and Feather in Iowa City. van Beek said he got the idea after seeing a jeweler in Georgia make a similar offer. “We hope people know about the crazy jeweler in North Liberty that does crazy things,” he said.  Customers are required to spend a minimum of $1999 on the ring. “Diamonds are a girls best friend,” van Beek said. “So say: I’m hunting deer, and here is a diamond ring, dear.”

MrMary Weighs In

Everyone knows that the worse part of a marriage is the meeting with the divorce lawyer. The shot-gun with the wedding ring is the preventative  to all this headache. it in many ways echos the sentiments of Malcolm X‘s powerful speech the bullet or the ballot. Here comes a quote:

Malcolm X [ in the speech] advised African-Americans to judiciously exercise their right to vote, but he cautioned that if the government continued to prevent African-Americans from attaining full equality, it might be necessary for them to take up arms. It was ranked 7th in the top 100 American speeches of the 20th century by 137 leading scholars of American public address.

There is something unsettling about marriage.  I believe in marriage it can be a help to both sexes but like Malcolm X I must issue a caution. If marriage continues to drive more men and women into financial distress, and headfirst into the depths of emotional and moral depravity then we may have to take up arms to free ourselves from tyranny. Luckily for us there is a forward thinking jeweler in Iowa that have solved this question for us. Now we have the Ring and the Gun.  Now no one can get too comfortable in a relationship where a shot-gun came with a ring. There will have to be periodic mental exams to make sure things don’t get too out of hand. Maybe when there is the threat of lives being lost marriage can be a bit smoother.


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