Questions I hate Getting Asked: Do Black people support Obama because he is Black?

One of the questions I hate getting asked is: Do black people support Obama because he is black? – Since I have been delegated supreme ruler of all blacks with US citizenship of voting age who participate in the election, let me officially answer here on my blog:

A key component to being black is the support of everything that is in fact black/brown. We alone are responsible for all the purchases of pumpernickel bread though we cannot pronounce it, black construction paper, non white chocolate candy bars, anything with caramel, coca cola, ring dings, St Ides canned Malt liquor, and finally (for the sake of ending an otherwise exhaustive list) the cheap black umbrellas bought during rainstorms for $5 that break once the wind blows.

As an aside, this curious behavior also explains our love for running face first into both police batons and boots, and our attractions to the dark lonely recesses of the prison industrial complex and legal system. When  it comes down to elections we obviously don’t look at the issues. We don’t try to make educated decisions for ourselves in order to ascertain which candidates are better qualified to represent our needs. We just match colors like one would do paint at home depot

I am MrMary MF Poppins
And on behalf of the 13% of black people in this country
I endorse Flava Flav for the 2012 Election