Sex tape or Topless Photo Leaked? Here is The Ultimate Press Kit Solution

Scenario for Ladies

Somehow your sex tape/topless pics/box pics have leaked and now people know what you look like naked as if you constant tweeting bikini and other skank pictures had left much to the imagination. Later on in life you plan to run for Governor of California or some other bullshit political office based on your popularity and the fact that to everyone’s delight you are for a trickle down economy, as evidenced by the last 3 minutes of your supposed Sex tape. What do you do ?

Fight Fire with Fire

I’m so certain why topless pictures or sex tapes are big deals, everyone has done one. But for my press kit to work you will have to:

Find a people/culture you have no relationship preferably the kind National Geographic might feature in a magazine that catholic school boys will take to the bathroom when it comes around to their particular cul de sac of learning
Interact in such a way with this culture to remind everyone what colonialism and imperialism has done to disenfranchise millions and destroy cultures, languages , etc
Then do a great photo shoot with kids in school or something humanitarian

I call this the Kate Middleton Press Kit. See for yourself