One hundred and sixty-six bloggers have thrown down their respective gauntlets in a battle for supremacy. And while supremacy for bloggers doesn’t carry the same weight as a battle for naval power in the South China Sea , or economic leverage in the developing world would; it still has many perks like 360+ days of bragging and more daily blogviews.
Despite promises of more views and prizes here I stand, MrMary, the one blogger with no gauntlet to throw down, the one blogger who has no one cheering for him, who has not tweeted judges pictures of his junk, or asked you the reader to do anything other than the nothing you do, something with which judging from my blog views, lack of likes, and comments you are intimately familiar.
Some bloggers are born great, some over the course of hundreds or thousands of post have achieved greatness. Then there is me, a poor player, fretting on the stage with the robes of greatness suddenly cast upon him. While I am not fearful of greatness, I am weary of it and its responsibility.
I was given a mandate from the people inhabiting the blogosphere, all 5 of them. Now in addition to my excessive testicular fortitude, I now have something I was always lacking: the consent of my people to use it in so public a fashion.
I plan on giving them a new kind of blogger. As for the thankless job of telling them how things really are, I plan on giving it to them raw. To than end I have refitted, refurbished and re-lubed my rapier wit. Now I stand ready and waiting for your call to remove the only thing standing in my way: the see-through nebulous simulacra of meaning that lasciviously clothes all reality.
Well Wishes & Good Luck
And so while you await to see what the judges have decided and fate decreed, I bid all 166 of you the best of luck, I hope you place highly on the list and to the top 13 I offer you official titles and the customary large expanses of fertile land in my fiefdom of fictitiousness. I on the other hand shall venture forth into new and uncharted realms, deep into the verdant expanses of foolishness and free porn.
Life as we know it is already as tedious as a twice-told tale; isn’t it better to be a witty fool than a foolish wit ?