Telling the Truth about my Beloved Readers – My 100th Post

Soundtrack

This is my 100th post and I must say that writing this blog has been quite fun, and instead of telling you how much I appreciate all your comments and likes or letting you know what 10 or twenty things I am going to do next I will do something better and instead tell you a few things about you the reader.

What is a stripper without a pole (metallic or flesh) or a blogger without an audience, nothing really. I think I have learned as much about you as you have learned about me through the subterfuge of lascivious diction, crass imagery and carefully concealed social commentary. Ultimately other people serve a great role of holding up a mirror for us to see ourselves in ways we could  not before, and just for you I am going to hold up the mirror for you to see yourself right here on my 100th post.

Observations About you the Audience

Supposedly I look like this dude when I get all gussied up for those of you who want to know, but aside from the muscles I don't see it 🙂

You guys love free amateur eye candy. Every time I put a semi-revealing picture of myself my stats go through the roof and of course I like that, between the 3 jobs I work an ego boost helps, (and no I am not Jamaican). I just fear what I will do when it so happens that I am bored and my stats dip a bit.

The main question I envision some of you asking right now in your head is whether I would go the route of getting personal with you and show you my face or do I get more progressively nasty and show you all what you really want to see – me playing the tuba in a wet “I’m with stupid T-shirt”. I’m guess I am working out to be your recession special, faceless, free, low- budget eye-candy.

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I have more female readership than I do male. My top  commentors are all gorgeous voluptuous women, in my head at least. Every time I make a pro-cunnilingus comment I am inundated with ‘likes’ and comments .  This tells me that either womendom in general is as under service as my friend’s ’78 Nova he some how manages to drive around, or that box lunches have fallen are no longer the rage as a consequence of depilatories being not widespread in terms of usage. It seems that no to few guys want to service Lilluth Fair pussy. Also drunk half naked women soccer fans  are the modern equivalent of the baccanalian orgiastic get together.

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You guys are more perverted and in love with innuendo than I am. Supply and demand is a dirty business and though I haven’t ascertained which of us (the blogger or audience) has the upper hand in this exchange, it’s not a hand I would want to shake or bring to dinner. So far I supply you with innuendo laced posts and you love it and eat it up and I like watching you eat it up so I guess we are both fucked.

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Most of my male readership find their way to my blog by accident googling the following: Sasha Grey Porn, Kim Kardashian Nude, Sushi Jokes about How Much Can Fit into your Mouth, Sasha Grey Porn Pics, Horse Versus Human Pics, Adult Big Cock tumblr, oral Herpes Early stages, better sex, the cosmo sex challenge, peeing torture, Cunnilingus (There may be hope for you ladies out there) Herpes on Dick, Mary Poppins porn. It’s Fucking Crazy. The majority of my search terms are pretty much X-rated, you would think this blog was a porno site. I generally talk use dirty jokes as a means to allude to other things which are in no way dirty like the ramification of the overlap between the sexual experience and the mystical experience and its consequence for the Western socio historical portrayal of Love, …. but from some of these search terms its clear to say that ‘dudes is just seriously nasty’.

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You must Love J-Lo and Kim Kardarshian. My two post poking fun at them are my most read posts. I didn’t understand why until I heard the following song on the KROQ the other morning when I was up early for no reason what so ever.

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Not only is it hard out there for a pimp, it’s hard out there for daters. Maybe there is a correlation, this could be a promising area of scientific endeavor if any of you are into hypothesis driven research. Where is Iceberg Slim when you need him? For those of you who  don’t know Iceberg slim was a pimp who after a 10th trip to jail changed his life around and wrote books detailing the realities of the pimp game. Seems he had mommy issues. Of course with that said, I have to hit you with the eponymous Iceberg slim quote: “Any sucker who believes a ho loves him shouldn’t have fell outta his mammy’s ass”. <awkward pause> Anyways dating is hard, my heart goes out to anyone who is dating.

Finally…

I think that  is as cogent, succinct and sensical as this post is gonna get. You guys are awesome thanks for supporting my nonsense and just taking the time to comment and like and show love 🙂

“Insert My real name” aka MrMary