Tag Archives: People

May 10 2013

As long as the general population is passive….


230px-Chomsky

As long as the general population is passive,

apathetic,diverted to consumerism or hatred of

the vulnerable,then the powerful can do as they

please, and those who survive will be left to

contemplate the outcome.”

– Noam Chomsky

Apr 22 2013

MrMary On Blogging: What Would You Do if Your Blog Got Famous ?


What would I do if this blog got famous?

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MrMary is prepared for everything. You can rest assured that if my blog got famous I would delete it or  stop writing on it. It’s been a while since I looked at my daily views. You see I write for specific reasons.

I feel that the human voice collectively as well as individually is gradually being silenced. That individual spark that makes us who we are is being replaced by societal political and economic ideologies that we are forced to  espouse in order to live the shattered lives we all lead . Blogging is a means to an end; it allows me to communicate and interact despite the heavy clouds of disillusionment and cynicism. It is a redemptive act because the want to connect with others is sincere. I would sincerely like to connect to people. Fame changes all of that.

The more people are attracted to you the more superficial  their connection to you is  I feel. Then there is this possessiveness and pressure to produce ceaseless because some want to be entertained. Of course the more and more you accede to these demands the more you lose that connection with the inspirations that started you blogging in the first place. The want to connect  sincerely and fame do not follow all the time

You Would Leave Us ?

Not completely, my email will always be mrmarymf.poppins@gmail.com but the real question  or maybe a more involve question is what’s more important to you the reader the writing and stuff that come out of me or  the person behind it. I think I have done a good job of blurring the lines here between MrMary and I.

It has been said that to walk through a garden is to walk through the mind of the Gardener. For the few of you who regularly read this blog, you have walked through my mind, its something raucous humor, it’s absurd  recapitulations of the days events, the sometimes poetic propensities, and some other crazy stuff. I have offended some of you, I have made you laugh, I have opened topic for discussion, and shared with you some of my more human moments. I am more than satisfied with what I have been doing here on ASpoonfulofSuga. I have 2 other blogs and I havent shown them any love. I am drawn to write here so here I continue to do so but every things has its heyday  and then fades. Before I left though I would do leave in an over the top fashion.

Seriously

There is a song in French I remember hearing a lot as a young lad. It told a story of the locksmiths daughter who was a bit strange, she use to hide in a charrette, like a cart if I remember correctly, staring far out into no-where , which used to unsettle the other kids. To add to the strangeness she used to speak aloud – she was in her own little word which made her doll-like voice all the more strange.

One day the other kids in the neighbourhood decided to hide nearby so that they could hear what she was was saying without being detected. and she said some very simple things: ‘Give me some bread to eat tomorrow, Give me eyes to see the blue sky, give me your hand.” It is of course more poignant in French.  Sometimes I feel that these blog post are like that, in the sense that there are moments of levity in my day, brief moment of respite where I am drawn to sit in front of the computer and write. Usually I have no plan, after I write I don’t edit and leave things raw. Actually quite often I come back to these post and read them and they make me laugh and shake my head. I am  writing as much as possible for sincerity and to share the my vision of things as it comes into focus.

I don’t know how compatible that is with fame ?

I would use those 5 minutes of fame before I disappeared to promote other people’s blog and some hum,humanitarian causes I’m passionate about. I had great “conversation” this weekend with some other bloggers, and ran into some new faces. Check these bloggers out:

http://levantwoman.wordpress.com/  I have rarely read a blog as touching and raw
http://tarnishedsophia.wordpress.com – Honest sincere thoughts and comments, I would invite her to starbucks for coffee or some pumpkin spiced over priced bullshit and just talk. She plays PS3 too, which means that she really fucking cool. I might have  to test her skills in MK9
http://www.daanvandenbergh.com/ – Daan is a real person, meaning he isn’t full of shit, he is about something When I make it to the Netherlands we are gonna shoot the shit and drink some beer Heineken first then maybe onto a Dutch Witbier ( thats not a sexual move you do with a Dutch girl named Tess or Lotte, it’s a type of beer)

Anyways

What about You, What would you do if your blog got famous

Dave

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Apr 22 2013

Can Someone Objectify me on Lulu ? – Girls-Only App That Objectifies Men


This might just be the best way to address Gender Inequality.

In London, two long-time friends Alison Schwartz and Alexandra Chong have an app that helps women anonymously gossip about men.  On Lulu, men aren’t allowed in, and women can anonymously rate them without their consent.  The men, who are all guys the women know via Facebook, are rated on a scale of one to ten. Their profiles are automatically pulled in when the women they know access Lulu. When rating a man, women are prompted to share how they know him (friend, ex-girlfriend, etc), then asked to check off all the good and bad qualities about the man that apply.

The tone is playful and funny. Quality hashtags include #Big Feet and #One Woman Man for pros, and #Obsessed With His Mom and #Napoleon Complex for cons. The women can see how many people have favorited a profile (people following that man’s profile for real-time updates and alerts), and how many women have viewed the profile.

This may be the first step towards reconciliation between the sexes. According to this, objectification was never the issue, it was always that objectification didn’t lead to an increase in $ or wealth. Also many people have gotten engaged because of this app and doomed themselves to a mediocre life. They seem to have all the bases covered. I will add you to my personal FaceBook if You want to Help Objectify me
Dave :-D
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Apr 21 2013

My Responce to LeCLown’s Show Her It’s a Man’s World


I had spent all of Saturday looking at apartments as I have to be out of my place by June 1st. I have been home for about an hour and finally had a moment to process and read an interesting post from The ClownOnFire Blog entitled: “Show Her It’s a Man’s World“. I started writing this as a comment but I felt after a while that it would be best as a blog post, so that I can invite the few brave souls who constitute my faithful readership, to share your thoughts on the matter and visit LeClown’s Blog if you havent already.

Gender Inequality Ruminations

I have been ruminating on Gender Inequality and gender relationships for the past few months producing in particular 3 interesting post that in a way have served to catalogue the ongoing conversation in my mind. Without a doubt gender inequality exists, and there are very questionable sentiments  in our society about rape, look at what these politicians have said . Also mass media seeks to exploit gendered inequalities to make a profit rather than to educate and empower. But beyond these and other clear ramification of gender effect we can see and measure in our society I think it is important to bring up what we dont easily see everyday and I would like to add these observations of mine to an already interesting discussion that I read in the comment section of Le Clown’s Post

Observations

#1  If I look subset of the American population that comprises the female demographic  I don’t see all the women there have the same potential for success, social mobility. The women here are of different enthnicites, religious  and linguistic backgrounds, they are of different ages, sexual orientations etc. This  is a very diverse group, and the playing field isn’t level when it comes to education, financial awareness, access to legal representation, medical coverage, life expectancy, social mobility. Look at the following women while in our minds we may say they are all equal socially they are not

The FEMEN Topless  acts clearly shows that Western Caucasian women still house very colonial and sometimes racists attitude when approaching with or deal with their counterparts from other religions, cultures, racial backgrounds other than their own.

I bring up this point not to complain but to illustrate how complex this issue is. it is quite possible that the privileges that one group experiences (unwillingly or not) can in fact be the one of the possible roots of the continued observable inequality. If we don’t make sure to  include these observations in our discussions then what happened in the early history of feminism the emancipation and preoccupation of one main subset of the total group of women will occur again

tesrt#2 The lack of inclusive Dialogue - I have noticed a lack of inclusive dialogue inclusive of men. A whole essay can be written about why this exists. But the main point I want to bring up is that  it is always the most extreme proponents of any movement or ideology that are heard the most. I have met some very radical feminist that I feel do a disservice to the movement and to just discussion.

One reason why I feel there are isn’t inclusive dialogue or that  it is difficult as for men to include themselves in the issues is because there are many factions and groups in feminist dialogue: Socialist feminist , Marxist feminist, radical feminists, ecofeminist and it goes on and on. With so many groups each vying for an audience and a chance to share their agenda it become very difficult to facilitate or include people who want to contribute  but who are not necessarily followers of an ideology.

I think that this suppression of women has had extremely serious ramification in terms of the psychology of the men and women in the West. In seeking to suppress women we have sound top repress the expression of many feminine characteristics which of course has clearly lead to the the unbalanced psychologies we see in the west or rather I see. I think it is important to approach this topic from a place that involves inclusion of men and an the emergence of an integrated healthy psychology.

Unknowing Support - The companies that shape the images help maintain and reinforce gender inequality are invested heavily in many different industries. We can although refusing to buy one product still support the company because they endorse manufacture/distribute many other products. We can choose to not buy dove soap  but how effective will that be when Unilever the company that owns Dove make 400 other products like margarine , ice cream, tea noodles, bouillon cubes etc ( Check out the list here.

I have an idea basically to take this conversation even further. But I have to get back to work now, My Main point is that if this gender inequality persists to this day it might be that all of us whether knowingly or unknowingly help maintain it in time. I think we each and everyone of us has to look at what it is that we are doing to help contribute to this social inequality.

Meanwhile Im back to work be well

Dave

 

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Apr 5 2013

The difference between and egalitarian and a Feminist from mrMary’s Point of View


I got a wonderful question from the lovely sistasertraline and I thought I would answer here and now like that Luther Vandross song. The Question is

Why would you not consider yourself a feminist if you

believe in equality Mr M?

Denotation VS Connotation

Egalitarian – Affirming, promoting, or characterized by belief in equal political, economic, social, and civil rights for all people.

Feminist – a person who advocates equal rights for women

From the dictionary definition alone I find that a feminist is concerned with females only. Historically that definition of female was very narrow, so narrow that it is still expanding to include more and more types of females.

Aside from that

But aside from that I should say that there are many types of feminists:

  1. Marxist Feminists
  2. Liberal Feminists
  3. Socialist Feminists
  4. Radical Feminists

I am not very well educated on this subject but these are the ones I hear about the most. But the term Feminism is a large umbrella turn that house many sub genres and each of them have  their own particular focus.  Maybe I can share with you some thoughts  and observations  I have had. Please keep in mind that I am not well versed in this and if anyone has anythign to share please do so, in a respectful manner.

  • I don’t see in American society at least a class of males or a class of women – which means males or females grouped together by a common interest or cause. That would be a great over simplification to think of all the women in the US belonging to a single class
  • I think inequality is at the basis of all societies democratic, socialist, communist, totalitarian. There are and will be always the have and the have-nots. The inequality that exists in society is created and maintained in time by a complex of factors of which gender is one.
  • Patriarchy isn’t the same everywhere. There isnt a universal form of patriarchy. it comes in many flavors, and being that (at least in America, we are a nation of immigrants I would imagine that patriarchy here comes in many types of flavors. Patriarchy isn’t as firmly entrenched now as it was maybe a millennia ago or even I would say after the fall of the holy roman empire in Europe when Napoleon organised the confederation of the Rhine. The Judeo-christian roots of the west have a lot to do with how patriarchy is  understood  and I don’t feel many links are maid to the ramification of this ideology and it subsequent proliferation in Western and Eastern Europe. (with the exception of course of Moorish Spain for about 700 years)
  • I don’t see capitalism being overthrown any time soon and the rise of the proletariat, which may make it difficult for me to understand the Marxist feminist and how they plan to meet their aims. I also wonder if economic dependence nowadays with more women having benefited from college education and more exposure to higher paying position is still the main reason for the subjugation of women

These are just my thoughts. I don’t like to affiliate myself to any social or political movement because there is always the question of can social movement evolve through time and always have the necessary leadership and general education  among their members so that in advancing their causes they are not exploiting other groups. I think the issue is that movements break apart over time and the existence of many subgenre dilutes the possible impact they could have.

Uhm in other words I support all rights but wouldnt call myself a feminist because feminist, so far from what I have seen while they do care about other groups of people, are primarily focused on advancing the cause of women in a nutshell. Even the term egalitarian cna be deconstructed  like feminism and I am sure has many holes in it as well. But I will always be more for an integrated platform of a larger quest for social, economic and political justice of all people. I guess I like to aim high for the stars ?

 

 

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Apr 5 2013

Greatest moments in Blogging History Part 2 – MrMary goes topless to Support Women .. sorta well w/ some caveats


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Someone in my neighborhood had a few months ago written this on a few places. It really got me thinking a lot. I am not a fan of cops as you can guess  and so far some of the meanest craziest women I have met have been feminist  so I am not sure arming them unless it is with knowledge  would help.  I would like to share some observations I have had concerning women, feminism and current going on in the news.

Observation

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You don’t need to arm feminist as long as there are breast to be exposed.

My Critic on Movements

Feminism is a movement, a social movement, and I have noticed that historically it was not an inclusive. What I mean is that feminism start out as a predominantly white caucasian western movement. Later on other racial and ethnic groups where included  Do you know the case of Frances  Williard.

Willard was the secretary of the Woman’s Christian Temperance Union, one of the most formidable women’s organizations in the country, with branches in every state and a membership of over 200,000. Willard had used the issue of temperance to politicize women who saw organizing for suffrage as too radical.

Willard had conducted during a tour of the South in which Willard had blamed Blacks for the defeat of temperance legislation there and had cast aspersions on the race. “The colored race multiplies like the locusts of Egypt,” she had said, and “the grog shop is its center of power… The safety of women, of childhood, of the home is menaced in a thousand localities.”

The problem here is that not all women share the same social, economic, and  political status as white woman in the west.  Women are a very large and diverse group  they are half the population. They speak different languages, they have different religions, different values. To think that freedom means the same to every women every where in every culture etc is ludicrous.

Many European countries and America too have very negative and misguided views on Islam. I wrote about this before in my post: Taking the Negative: Islam and terrorism

So far as the United States seems to be concerned, it is only a slight overstatement to say that Moslems and Arabs are essentially seen as either oil suppliers or potential terrorists. Very little of the detail, the human density, the passion of Arab-Moslem life has entered the awareness of even those people whose profession it is to report the Arab world. What we have instead is a series of crude, essentialized caricatures of the Islamic world presented in such a way as to make that world vulnerable to military aggression.

-Edward Said

Do muslim women need saving ? Do they need topless Women marching for them. Are the topless women really marching for the people they say they are?  Do they have a culutral understanding of Islam and the many cultural around the world that have Islam in their midst ? Are they not exploiting these women to their own end?

I don’t know the answers to any of these questions But I do know that some women have voiced the following sentiment:

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GReatest Moments in Blogging PART 2

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I stand for free rights for every human being regardless of age race,gender, religious creed, height and size. But I do feel that going topless without educating myself on the intricacies of an observed social phenomenon or without opening a serious non-biased dialogue with the people I am going topless for is meaningless and an insult to free thinking

So here I stand topless to support women sorta

 

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Apr 4 2013

I cant Listen to my GF’s Ipod: MrMary Converses w/ His Non-Italian Friend akak Fat Fucking Sal


My Observations

We care a lot about how others view us and how much we adhere to what society expects of us that we don’t really spend time I feel being completely ourselves. We present a different version ourselves to every person we meet. We fear being judge so much.

My friend  has been with his gf for many years and she is a very educated women. But her selection of music is kind of not fitting to her status and education or so she thinks. I find it very endearing that even though she is a strong women and very well educated she listens to a lot of as my friend calls it: Hipster bullshit and overly romantic shit. I don’t know this started and this is none of my business but I find it humorous. Basically one can engage in sexual relation with a person,  which to me is as intimate physically as one can get but sharing songs and musical taste is too invasive a move because an image of ourselves created in another’s mind might not fit or match the image we hold ourselves too.

I saw this image on facebook and it made me think:

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You know are no point are you being yourself completely. At every moment it seems your living for an image that never could satiate our deep seated need for wholeness.  I know this image is meant to be sarcastic or funny but I think it points to a deeper problem plaguing our society and that is the lack of a entrench self-identity. Just my two cents

THE CONVO (reader discretion is advised)

I have some close male friends. As is typical to males of my age who still have some hope of making something of ourselves we show our affection for each other  by insulting each other or poking fun. I present you this conversation to  hopefully open up for discussion something I have witnessed. The language is crass and vulgar and inappropriate on all levels. But this dude is my friend for many years and I couldn’t bring up and share with you an observation I have had without giving you a bit of our conversation. If You offend easily please don’t read. You can Skip straight to the observations:

MRM: Paisano whats good with ya
FFS: no mucho man
MRM: So ya fat bastard  ready to get this lunch
FFs: yeah Im ready but let’s stop by CVS first

- ah yeah? you need that shampoo
what shampoo ?
that crabs shampoo because you’re building a bridge of understanding between homosexuality and heterosexuality one cock at at time

Fuck you dude lol  ….  Eventually you are going to have to change or grow up  or  “MrMary lady’s Name” will leave yo ass

Yea for what? to date some fat bloated fuck with a better credit score that showers her in gifts of imaginary orgasms …. yeah  I’m perpetually broke but the nuts busted are real

Man you need to get out that little office you work in for some air

Yeah I like it tho …. when I jerk off at my desk its like I’m doing a mini David Carradine – starved of some of that O2  (obscene hand gesture)

< general laughter>

Man that was wrong MrMary’s Nick Name  …

yeah I know I am like the biggest David Carradine fan …. Dude  really we came all this was for some fucking Icy Hot.

Yeha man my whole back is sore

yeah your boyfriend works out …wait for it .. all in dat

Dude there is a lady with her baby

Ok first off judging from my own mishaps there was prolly a lot of trying before the baby came some of it drunk  and misguided if ya get me

Ok Man I am gonna go on line

(waiting in line …….)

_________________

You like this song ?
yeah man

how come ? It’s not your style

well I was listening to my gf’s ipod and I she has this song on it and it grew on me

Me and my lady share an ipod

I couldn’t do that… She doesn’t let me listen to her ipod

wait , so you can put your dirty self all over her privates and proceed to sweat over her like the greasy fugging bastard you are  and do all that shit but cant listen to her ipod.

uhm.., yeah

Wow how far we have fallen, I’m guess that any day now you’ll really have a chat with her and she will tell you she is asexual and you’ll tell her you like throat tickling but in a way she cannot provide

Seriously dude,  We’re in line

My Fault………..

Mar 8 2013

The Physics-Defying Power Of Women, Happy International Women’s Day From MrMary Mutha Fucking Poppins


I am dedicating a whole series of posts with my favourite lady bloggers this month. Some posts are serious and some are not so serious. In that spirit I present you:

The Physics-Defying Power Of Women

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Mar 5 2013

Starting International Woman’s Month The Right Way


doris

“Do you know what people really want? Everyone, I mean. Everybody in the world is thinking: I wish there was just one other person I could really talk to, who could really understand me, who’d be kind to me. That’s what people really want, if they’re telling the truth.”

~ Doris Lessing

As I have discussed somewhere here on the blog reading is very important to me.  I spent many years alone with the Alone, watching childhood with all it’s lofty preoccupations evanescence into lofty expanses of exigency – what I have come to see now as the defining feature of adulthood. And while lost in the story, I would find that emotions and deep-seated impulses I wasn’t resourceful enough articulate right there, staring me in the face. perfectly wrapped in usually the meandering diction and imagery. I was fortunate to be instructed in reading.

We all can read but how much more can we see than just words? So many of us, as Ms. Lessing has indicated above, long for that other person to talk in the ambiance of sincere understanding and kindness, yet that person doesn’t exist that person never have but that shouldn’t deter use from looking. Each conversation, and every person we can share something with brings us one step close to an asymptotic-satiety.

For me I have had some great conversations that have made all the silence and quiet desperation worthwhile. These conversations happened at random times with a variety of people. And as time goes on I am starting to feel that the people, places the conditions are starting to be irrelevant because I am hearing one conversation – one endless beckoning or an eternal gémissement as is said in French. It’s all been one conversation. But before venturing even deeper into some epistemological or philosophical inquiry about oneness, the nature of this singular  conversation, etc I think it is important to take a moment to stop, admire; celebrate really the lovely people, places, and contexts from which many great and interesting conversations have emerged. I think I should be clear on one thing before I continue and that is that words are just vehicles, they are empty except for what they carry – what is really being communicated is something else I think much more subtle. Whatever that “is” makes for me the relationship between writer and reader, blogger and their audience all the more important.

To that end

So I wanted to celebrate you guys, my readers. Being that the mass-majority of my readers are women and March is International Women’s Month I figure the only way to celebrate is to collaborate on some interesting project with  lady- bloggers (bloggerettes) who are

  1. much prettier than me
  2. much more popular than me
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There is an interesting story behind this pic. I really like cereal and milk tho on the side

I had to search a long time to find women both prettier and popular than me, as you can tell by this picture I’m one sexy mofo. But here are the lovely specimens I will be collaborating with month for the 2013 Have you Been Experienced Blog Tour

The PixieGirl

The PixieGirl

The Effervescent Pixie Girl – At first I thought a pixie girl was a mythic being that seemed to live in the British Isle known for being benign, mischievous, short of stature and attractively childlike;  fond of dancing outdoors.  While she is from the British Isles and is fond of dancing outdoors she is actually a cross between the delicious wholesomeness of an apple pie, the enchantingness of the Siren of the Oddysey, mixed with a lil Punky Brewster and a brandy Alexander on a cold night right before bed.

fernglassessideThe Alluring Ms. Fox - The original Foxy Lady  She is multi-faceted extremely perceptive and articulate woman. I I love her blog. She has a beautiful family and she has her sanity intact which is an accomplishment. She is into fitness and  has a delightful sense of humour. She put  up a video of Muddy Waters and R Kelly and that’s awesome for me. Cant say enough nice things about the lovely Ms Fox

32f4b115691f837ea89ec7b1994fda10Becca aka The Phenom aka the Diamond Princess, Aka Big Mamma Smiles
You may know her as Becca from the 25toFly blog but I know her as Big Mamma Smiles. She is wonderfully nice in ways I could not be, not just because I have a penis which is a good thing if you are in a jam, I like those kinds of jams btw.  When I take the subway I never see anyone smile, and for many years it was so difficult for me to smile. She seems to smile so effortlessly and largely. Her Blog is WordPress’s own House of the Rising son – it’s been the ruin of many a poor boy…(N’Orleans reference) I confess to spending time on her site when I should be at work pretending to be busy

6d5dad638ed39c3640c80633d17408f0Ms Tracey – aka the Beating Heart  – Author of InkPaperPen -
Sincerity and innocence are her hallmark. She is a lovely person and going on her blog is like getting a free hug. She is socially conscious  and her posts are endearing, thought-provoking and sincere

…… and some surprises along the way

Stay Tuned….

 

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Mar 1 2013

The have You Been Experienced Blog Tour for March 2013


Finally the stars have aligned and MrMary can bring his blog tour to you.  The theme for this blog tour is of course celebrating those lady bloggers that I find cool.  It is my hope that chilling and collaborating with this subset of fine ladies will be a way of celebrating women during International Women’s Month.  I am keeping it a secret for now who I will collaborating with but stay tuned.  It’s all going to start March 4th.

Are you ready ?

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Feb 14 2013

MrMary Reads: The First Man by Albert Camus


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Excerpt # 1

“And the wave of tenderness and pity that at once filled his heart was not the stirring of the soul that leads the son to the memory of the vanished father, but the overwhelming compassion that a grown man feels for an unjustly murdered child – something here was not in the natural order and, in truth, there was no order but only madness and chaos when the son was older than the father. The course of time itself was shattering around him while he remained motionless among those tombs he now no longer saw, and the years no longer kept to their places in the great river that flows to its end. They were no more than waves and surf and eddies where Jacques Cormery was not struggling in the grip of anguish and pity. He looked at the other inscriptions in that section and realized from the dates that this soil was strewn with children who had been the fathers of graying men who thought they were living in this present time. For he too believed he was living, he alone had created himself, he knew his own strength, his vigor, he could cope and he had himself well in hand. But, in the strange dizziness of that moment, the statue every man eventually erects and that hardens in the fire of the years, into which he then creeps and there awaits its final crumbling – that statue was rapidly cracking, it was already collapsing. All that was left was this anguished heart, eager to live, rebelling against the deadly order of the world that had been with him for forty years, and still struggling against the wall that separated him from the secret of all life, wanting to go farther, to go beyond, and to discover, discover before dying, discover at last in order to be, just once to be, for a single second, but forever.”

Expert # 2

“Squeezed against each other in the heavy heat, they were silent…looking toward the home that was expecting them–quiet, perspiring, resigned to this existence divided among a soulless job, long trips coming and going in an uncomfortable trolley, and at the end an abrupt sleep. On some evenings it would sadden Jacques to look at them. Until then he had only known the riches and the joys of poverty. But now heat and boredom and fatigue were showing him their curse, the curse of work so stupid you could weep and so interminably monotonous that it made the days too long and, at the same time, life too short.”