Category Archives: What I’m Drinking

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Apr 8 2013

What I Drank All Weekend: SpeakEasy’s Big Daddy IPA aka Sex w/ an Ex you never want to be with


Speakeasy-Big-Daddy-IPA

Disclaimer: How these Beer Reviews Work

Beer review are shamefully boring. Basically every beer review speaks about how a beer looks when poured into a glass. Then you are exposed to a discussion of mouth-feel, aroma, carbonation and finally taste.

Personally if I wanted to listen to soul-crushing palaver I would sit in a bar in a more affluent or hipster area of town where I can be continually bombarded, like the city of Dresden, with beer recommendations by someone who looks like an acid -induced nightmare from 1972.  I have no malice towards hipsters. Without hipsters there would be no need to gentrify neighbourhoods and subsequently transform the good, original indigenous culture or sentimentality into a machine for the propagation of some surreptitious capitalistic aim.

To that end I make sure that each of my beer reviews are, free from any reference to patchouli oil, and fully engaged with the reality of the human experience.

Big Daddy IPA

waits

I’d rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.

Tom Waits

I was done with IPA’s.  My life was bitter enough thank you very much. I had tried Stone IPA, Smuttynose Ipa, Racer 5 IPA, Harpoon IPA, Lagunitas IPA  and the list goes on ad nauseum. I don’t remember what the last IPA I had was, I just knew it was over. I moved on, dabbled in the  Quadrupels, Tripels, Barley-wines, and Stouts.

As chance would have it, this weekend my fridge was not stocked with libations well there was a Corona (don’t judge me).  It had been a long week, a tiring week, and to cap it off with drinking Bud Or Coors light would have add insult to injury. I rushed to the super-market and came across an inordinate amount of swill. I almost was resigned to my fate of a sober weekend when out of the corner of my eye I spotted Big Daddy IPA.  The rest is history. Literally I killed the whole six pack over the course of the weekend.

Official Review

speakeasy

This is amazingly drinkable. It is one of the most drinkable beers let alone IPA’s I have come across. But here is an official review for all of you who need overinflated jibber-jabber to validates your presumed self-importance

Aroma/ Look / Taste / Mouthfeel

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There is my favourite bottle opener given to me as a gift brought all the way from Scotland.

The aroma is predominantly that of hops finishing in particular. (By finishing hops I mean hops added in the final stages of a wort boil or dry-hopped in the fermenter for the purpose of lending hop flavour and/or aroma to the finished beer. -You will encounter the finishing hops again after your first sip.)

The taste is characteristic of what you would expect from an IPA. I was hit first with  a coppery, grapefruit pith, piney  taste common to IPA’s then I was accosted in the best way possible with a nice citrus note. The citrus note in this case was more of an orangey-floral note. You get hint of some malty sweetness.

The carbonation is very subtle, and that in combination with  the creamy texture/mouth-feel added a lot to the drinkability of this beer. The finish was a bit dry and bitter but not overpoweringly so. What stuck out to me the most was that I wasn’t over powered and prison man-handled by the hop profile and bitter after-taste.

Recommendations / Food Pairings

I would recommend this to someone who hasn’t tried an IPA yet. It has all the character of an IPA but it is not too bold. It is very palatable and drinkable.  I like drinking beer and I never felt the need to pair it with anything. It just so happened that  during the course of my drinking I do shovel food into my face. With that said I have to say that spicy foods – Indian style curries, Mexican food, grilled meat, hamburgers, pizza definitely something about the tomato and garlic  for me at least. Any kind of really sweet and spiced dessert should work as well, it will bring out the malt profile.

Overall Conclusions

bukowski

That’s the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen.

Charles Bukowski

You’re at a party. You been avoiding going out for a bit but today you finally made it. While you scan the room making  a mental note of who you will avoid, your eyes lock with another familiar pair. These eyes are familiar and while seemingly inviting there is an element of danger because they belong to an ex-lover (girlfriend or boyfriend).

You are both adults so you sit to chat and both of you instinctively ask for stuff drink before you get there. There is awkward chatter and more drinking. You don’t hate each other, and still have the fleeting thought that things could get back together at some rosy time in the future where communist where bright colors and aviator glasses finally go out of style and die for good. But now isn’t then.

Somehow the more you talk the more familiar habits resurface, and then there is an awkward pause where you both realize that the other person for years has been trained to please you, to give you just what you like how you like it.  Fun sexy times occur and its the best ever. You can curse and call the other person names and not act like you don’t mean it and are just babbling incoherently like biblical time possession. You can grab some hair (from the roots) and you both make sure  to help the other arrive.  You know you never want to see this muthafucker again but even while your heart is empty looking for love your loins are assuaged and that’s all that counts

That was for me what drinking this beer was like. I swore off IPA’s like I would a bad relationship. I ducked and dodged them in the market, at the bar, until it just so happened that my back was against the wall. It had everything I liked , how I like, when I needed it the most. Now my fridge is stocked with the stuff I like -easy access makes it all the sweeter.

Upcoming Reviews

Past Reviews

  1. What I’m Drinking Tonight: Samuel Adams Octoberfest or Memories of German ex Gf
  2. What I’m Drinking Tonight: Brooklyn Lager Aka the Post Honeymoon working couple Handjob
  3. What I’m Drinking tonight: Narragansett Cream Ale aka Lazy Self-Loving
  4. What I’m Drinking Tonight: Boddintons Pub Ale
  5. What I Drank Saturday: La Fin Du Monde Tripel Style Beer aka My 1st Canadian Erection
  6. What I drank Wednesday Night (1): Guinness Draught The Not as Good Looking Younger Sister
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Oct 21 2012

What I’m Drinking: Upcoming Reviews


“That’s the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen.”

-Bukowski

____________________________________

Guys and Dolls

I thought I would share with you a list of  alcoholic products I will be reviewing in the near future. feel free to make some suggestion or chime in about what you  think about a product. This is not the entire list there is more lots more :-) – Drink responsibly

- MrMary

Featured Spirit

Jack Daniels Tennessee Honey

Beer/Ales/Stouts

New Beers

Unibroue Blanche De Chambly

Tripel Karmeliet – Brouwerij Bosteels

Unibroue Maudite

Smuttynose IPA

Founder Curmudgeon (Old Ale)

Radeberger Pilsner

Stone Ruination

Stone Arrogant Bastard

 

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Sep 10 2012

Another MrMary Sighting on 320 East 86th Street @ City Swiggers


It is the fifth time in as many days that the beer-swilling blogging phenom has been sighted at City Swiggers. What is City Swiggers you say? Well according to what MrMary himself told me:

“it is the only place large enough other than your mother’s box that can satisfy my craving and insatiable thirst…. for beer“

City Swiggers

For those of you who don’t know about City Swiggers

We’re a beer store and a beer bar in one. We have 30 seats with tables for those who want to enjoy a pint or a flight on premises. And we have about 600 beers in bottles (to go) on the shelves. Check out our tap list, above–at this Web page–or on the white board on the wall near the bar in the store. As for the bottles, we have domestic beers in the front (west wall, sorted by region/brewery) and imports and ciders in the back. The cooler has a little of everything, sorted by style.

MrMary’s Guide to enjoying City Swiggers

We were able to cajole MrMary into giving us his definitive guide to understanding City Swiggers:

  1. Don’t come in and try to show off your infinite knowledge of beer and make recommendation to strangers you dont even know. Also leave the guys behind the counter alone. They do not want to discuss hops with you or how double IPA‘s  are flooding  the markets, your stupid bathroom|kitchen home brew. Just Shut the Fuck up and let everyone drink in peace
  2. If you say things like:” Sometimes you just got to have a stout”, or anything stupid like that you should go drink sewage wwater with the other hipsters.

with that said

The staff is very knowledgeable and they have been great about helping me deciding what new beer to take home. They have a board on the wall with what is on tap. You can also find out what is on tap by checking out their website. Everything is pretty self explanatory. They have beer on the shelves in the front and back. it is a very impressive variety I might add. The ambiance is nice too. I would expect it being the upper east side that snob well to people, or people who aren’t as well to do but snobby would dominant this scene but every time I have been there it was quite enjoyable .

This specific Neighborhood Yorkville used to be home to many German and Eastern European immigrants. At one point in the past there were many beer halls here so there is a historic precedent I feel for City Swiggers. It’s been amazing every time Ive been there. All the beers I have reviewed I’ve bought here and its a win win.

Check City Swiggers out: http://www.cityswiggers.com/

City Swiggers
320 East 86th Street
New York, NY 10028
info@cityswiggers.com
212-570-2000

Hours

Mon – Thurs: 1pm – 10pm
Fri: 1pm – 11pm
Sat: Noon – 11pm
Sun: 11am – 8pm

you just may run into me,  and if you do, we will drink a beer to each other’s health then I will sign your autographs or babies or whatever body part (females only) you’d like me to.

What Im Drinking series

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Aug 21 2012

What I’m Drinking Tonight: Samuel Adams Octoberfest or Memories of German ex Gf


Overly reflective Beginning

As always when love comes into one’s life it always seems in the moment that everything so was incredibly lacking and tasteless, so bereft of meaning until this one person shows up. Life is suddenly enriched and everything now instead of being something to complain about becomes a door to some seemingly transcendental experience. But yet after everyone has parted ways and we are left alone with that longing that makes us go out searching for companionship, for a future worth working for the world is so much more drab than it ever was before and that’s not even the worst thing. The worst thing is the listlessness, the floating around like driftwood on the ocean, going wherever whenever. But in time we return back to ourselves, and back to life and continued onwards where-ever  lucky or destiny , fate or our hard working takes us. Then after the weeks have turned into months and the months years and the years into grey hairs, there is this one random moment, where the strange juxtaposition of a song and a drink awakens from the past this  vast structure of recollection, and one can almost swear to be able to hear the laughs of past loves.

What does this have to do with beer

Normally  when i do a beer review I make it purposefully ridiculous. I obfuscate and obscure a real life story or experience into a satirical expose on many facets of the human condition. Brooklyn Lager Aka the Post Honeymoon working couple Handjob, was really a reflection on time and how its passage changes relationship of course, but ultimately one’s sense of self. Lindemans Framboise aka the Dutch International Student, was a humorous meditation on a time i was hit on by a Dutch international student and realized too late that she in her bad English  wanted to get to know me biblically without the commitment. It was an interesting experience that reminded me of Nikos Kazantzakis‘ Zorba the Greek in particularly:

“Life is trouble. Only death is not. To be alive is to undo your belt and look for trouble.”

While I drank this beer and heard some lines  from Aznavour, I listen to him a lot when I write late at night into the wee  morning hours. I remember a plan me and my German ex-gf had made long time ago to go to Oktoberfest and drink ourselves silly. We had a bet 20 Euros between us that I could out drink any hardcore Bavarian beer drinker under the table. While that trip was never actualized it stayed buried in my mind until today when I saw the Oktoberfest label while drinking and trying to relax.

Song lyrics with rough translation:

Dans d’autres bras, quand j’oublierai jusqu’à ton nom/ In other arms, when I will have forgotten even your Name
Quand je pourrai repenser l’avenir / When I will be able to re-think  the future
Tu deviendras pour moi, qu’un lointain souvenir / You will become for me that faded memory
Quand mon mal, et ma peur et mes pleurs vont finir / That my hurt, my fears and m tears will have finished

(Btw I have had a couple please excuse any mistakes in the French, and my tense conugation with the futur simple)

Octobertfest

A Note on this Type from BeerAdvocate.com

Before refrigeration, it was nearly impossible to brew beer in the summer due to the hot weather and bacterial infections. Brewing ended with the coming of spring, and began again in the fall. Most were brewed in March (Märzen). These brews were kept in cold storage over the spring and summer months, or brewed at a higher gravity, so they’d keep. Märzenbier is full-bodied, rich, toasty, typically dark copper in color with a medium to high alcohol content.

The Pour, The Aroma, The Taste

I really liked this beer, it was great to drink tasty great mouth-feel, complex taste, malty sweetness. Great when paired with of course sausage [chuckles]

Appearance

Dark copper colored, a finger worth of biege head that dissipates quickly leaving a minimal ring not much if any lacing

Smell

Some malt sweetness (precursor to the syrupy caramel notes in the taste) and flower scents. Not so much distinct floral scents but general floral sense, light sorta spice

Taste/Mouth Feel

Complex taste, there is some spice notes of course,  flowery notes as well that refer back to the aroma, there is a syrupy sweetness that is balances with a hoppy finish. This beer isn’t overly hopped but just the right amount. Great mouth feel to it.

Overall

This is very easy to drink. I drank a good 4 at a sitting before I stopped. This bitterness is very very moderate, more emphasis on the sweet malt and caramel notes. There is a dry finish to it as well.This is perfect for Autumn and will go great with many sausage based dishes. I would also thinks spicy foods and roasted meats like roast pork and roast chicken especially those with a sweet/spicy rubs.

Conclusions

This was a great beer and a great walk down memory lane.  It is very drinkable and very good.


“The places we have known do not belong solely to the world of space in which we situate them for our greater convenience. They were only a thin slice among contiguous impressions which formed our life at that time; the memory of a certain image is but regret for a certain moment; and houses, roads, avenues are as fleeting, alas, as the years.”
― Marcel Proust, Swann’s Way

But when from a long-distant past nothing subsists, after the people are dead, after the things are broken and scattered, taste and smell alone, more fragile but more enduring, more unsubstantial, more persistent, more faithful, remain poised a long time, like souls, remembering, waiting, hoping, amid the ruins of all the rest; and bear unflinchingly, in the tiny and almost impalpable drop of their essence, the vast structure of recollection.

― Marcel Proust, Swann’s Way

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Aug 17 2012

What I’m Eating and Drinking Special Addition: Bombay Sapphire Marinated Flank Steak and Pilsner


As some of you know I love cooking. I was ready to start the enrollment procedure at the French Culinary which means begging some bank for a loan. But luckily due some some good work I did as an undergrad I got my graduate degree paid for. People really think I am smart and believe in me it seems. But I cook for fun, to entertain guest, and to relax. If I cook something for you then it means I like you, and we are cool. If I make a decadent dessert then it means you’re a lady and I want to put some stuff in your box for safe-keeping. If You are a female friend of mine I’ll make the dessert but u got to bring something, like a side or drinks etc. When I moved out of my place I put all my things in storage, my food processor, electric mixer. Today I was happy  I got a chance to cook and i tried to do the best with what I had which was sparse and so here is  my :

Gin Marinated Flank Steak

Paired with a Brooklyn Pilsner

First the Excuses

I made this at 2:30 Am last night. My parents came in late from work (pops is retired and mom still work the late shift at the hospital) My pops was looking for something to eat, and my sister since bought a rice cooker has been making rice like the shits goin outta style. We had some fancy arugula, baby spinach and fancy-bullshit salad.

The Steak

I dunno why but I bought flank steak a few days ago and decided to that since it is a dense kind of cut of meat i would marinate it for a bit, 2 days worth

Some Info about Flank Steak

The flank steak is a beef steak cut from the abdominal muscles of the cow. A relatively long and flat cut of meat, flank steak is used in a variety of dishes including London broil and fajitas. It is significantly tougher than the other beef cuts; therefore, many recipes use moist Flank steak is best when it has a bright red color. Because it comes from a strong, well-exercised part of the cow, it is best prepared when cut across the grain. Flank steak is frequently used in Asian cuisine, and in Chinese markets it is often sold as “stir-fry beef” because that is how it is usually prepared. Most stir-fried beef dishes in Cantonese restaurants are prepared with this cut of beef.
cooking methods such as braising.

The Marinade

I learned about cooking flank steak from an older chinese gentleman I am honored to call a friend. He informed to cut thin, and cook it on high heat on the wok and some other secrets I cannot give away. So i though to make a sorta asian inspired sorta marinade. this is important I guess because I ended up using a shot of gin in the marinade.

Marinade

  1. Ginger paste
  2. Crushed garlic
  3. Sugar or Honey
  4. The Juice from a can of pickled Jalapenos (lil bit)
  5. Salt and Black pepper
  6. A shot of Gin
  7. Soy Sauce
  8. Touch of Red Wine vinegar (optional)
  9. Red pepper flakes

I wanted to go with the spicy/sweet sorta thing. When you make flank steak and cook it too long it becomes tough and dry and taste like old vag, not that I have but imagine years of weathering use and pickling made it tough like a leather baseball glove.

The Gin

I am a big fan of Bombay Sapphire Gin. Why? because it is smooth and is infused with an interesting variety of botanicals. It has a pronounced spicy taste, a nice kick to it. There is Plymouth Gin which is great as well, but I really like Bombay Sapphire. Bombay Sapphire uses the following botanical: Juniper berries, lemon peel, coriander, almonds, orris root, cubeb berries, Cassia bark, Liquorice Grains of Paradise and angelica. Whats better is that these flavors are infused into the gin through an interesting vaporization process but anyways its a subtle of flavor and the spicy I wanted to use here

End Result of all this

The meat gets broken down a bit when sliced thinly and cut across the grin (provide you cook at most medium rare to medium) it will be very tender and just fucking amazing, and very flavorful.

The Booze Pairing

Lately I haven’t been drinking much wine, mostly beer and cocktails and I figured the steak and the sorta Asian space palette would go well with a cocktail or beer. I had a beer but if I was to make a cocktail to go with it it would be the following, and guess what Gin I am using…

Sweet Ginger Brown

(Makes 1 drink)

Ingredients:

2 1/2 ounces gin
1/2 ounce fresh squeezed lime juice
3/4 ounces liquefied honey or sugar water

Directions:

Shake all ingredients together in a cocktail shaker with ice. Strain and pour straight up or on the rocks. Garnish with a lime slice. Food pairing: This Sweet Ginger Brown pairs well with red meat such as steak or lamb.

taken from here: http://www.sheknows.com/food-and-recipes/articles/805328/gin-cocktail-recipes-paired-with-food

Note on the cocktail - this recipe uses no ginger but traditionally it had ginger in it. I am thinking a ginger infused simple syrup  would be used. Also I have seen this made with rum, however i think the fresh lime Juice, paired with gin, in particular Bombay sapphire which has a distinct citrus note make it really fitting for this style of marinated red meat.I would still use 3/4 ounce of my ginger infused simple syrup or a rich syrup 1/2 oz fresh lime  and 2.5 oz of Bombay Sapphire. I would add them to my shaker in that order as well.

The beer pairing Id go for here would be an American Red Lager or  an even better choice would be a  good Pilsner in these case Brooklyn Brewery pilsner  was quite good paring. Why you ask ? ….

Being a delicate, light, unobtrusive beer, Pilsners are incredibly versatile with a variety of foods. Its clean and crisp and provides palate-cleansing bitterness, high carbonation, and malty sweetness. It will cut right through a spicy dish such as Thai, Vietnamese, Indian, Mexican, or Jamaican food,

 

Finishing up

To cook a  good steak you have to  start off with the pan on high heat to sear both sides and sear in the flavors and juices. Also after it has reached the done-ness you’d like you have to let it sit for a 5 minutes otherwise if u cut it right away all the juices will come out and it will be dry. Another secret thing I do is I have a whole garlic glove in the pan and after I turn over the first time in my pan mid way through cooking the other side I add a table spoon of butter. I  then after it melts spoon it over the top of the steak. You would not believe how amazing this makes the steak taste. Also of course i use olive oil first to cook it. After I take  out the steaks I throw away the garlic clove add some finely diced onion, and some jalapeno from the can who juice i used in the marinade, and  I saute them in the pan that i just took the steak out of. After they get a bit transparent I add a little water ( you can add some stock or a little bit of the booze you to marinate just watch out for the flames) and u pick up all the flavors stuck to the pan. I added the marinade to the pan and reduce it down by half and then I strained it through a fine strainer  added a little thickening agent, but not much  use that for a sauce over the steak and voila. You could also serve this with grilled red potatoes and blanched asparagus or string beans seasoned with bit of salt/pepper and butter

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Brooklyn-Lager
Aug 15 2012

What I’m Drinking Tonight: Brooklyn Lager Aka the Post Honeymoon working couple Handjob


In America:

Lager is to Beer as handjobs are to marriage

It’s a damning analogy that tells a lot about both beer and American culture and marriage. The Divorce rate in the US is somewhere near or at 50%. What does this mean for dudes looking forward to a long committed relationship that they will have to make lot of compromises for less than mediocre results. No where is this more pertinent then in the realm of marital sex which in fact is an oxymoron. To me and to those who have been in domestic partnerships, long gone are the days of passionate organ grinding and crevice plugging. Instead we are given business choices. You say said you have been with me for so long I might as well try to please you sexually but not in a way that is really good and you will ask me for me. This become specially the case when kids enter the picture.

What does this have to do with beer. Well lager is the beer that is most widely drunk in America, and handjobs are the sexual act most men in committed relationships receive. But before I take that further, let me hit you with soem facts:

Beer Consumption in the USA

Beer in the United States is manufactured by more than 1,700 breweries, which range in size from industry giants to brew pubs and microbreweries. The United States produced 196 million barrels of beer in 2009, and consumes roughly 20 US gallons (76 L) of beer per capita annually. In 2008, the United States was ranked 16th in the world in per capita consumption, while total consumption was second only to China.The most common style of beer produced by the big breweries is American lager, a form of pale lager.

Building a Case

All my married friends  say the same thing yeah its good for a while but after the honey moon is over its just begrudgingly given , lotion lacking handjobs. And this is understandable because according to the following studies

54% of dudes think about everyday or several times a day whereas for women only 19%. Hand jobs help breach this disparity. Most Americans suffer from fat-fuckingness, high levels of stress, over work  under paid, high blood pressure, rapidly increasing cost of living, all the basics to create a mediocre existence. There is a support group for that:

It’s only sensible that more often then not when beer is consumed lager will be chosen more than some other type of beer. it’s an easy fix just like a hand-job. I tend to personally find a lot of lagers watery and not to potent, I prefer the high alcohol content ales. Actually before I had this beer it had been ages since I had a lager.


Brooklyn Lager

Aka the Post Honeymoon working couple Handjob

What is Brooklyn Lager

[from the company's mouth, which I wasn't in]

In the late 1800’s Brooklyn was one of the largest brewing  centers in the country, home to more than 45 breweries.  Lager beer in the “Vienna” style was one of the local favorites. It is amber-gold in color and displays a firm malt  center supported by a refreshing bitterness and floral hop  aroma. Caramel malts show in the finish. The aromatic qualities of the beer are enhanced by “dry-hopping”, the centuries-old practice of steeping the beer with fresh hops as it undergoes a long, cold maturation. The result is a wonderfully flavorful beer, smooth, refreshing and very versatile with food. Dry-hopping is largely a British technique, which we’ve used in a Viennese-style beer to create an American original.

The Pour, The Aroma, The Taste

Aroma

Kind of dull, the correct term I would imagine people use is muted. There isn’t much aroma that comes off the beer, if anything some hops

Look

Copper colored abut a finger worth of foam that dissipates after a few minutes into a nice little ring, decent lacing or lacy-ness nothing I would get stiff about

Taste/ Mouthfeel

Slight touch of sweetness a the beginning but there is a clear taste of hops. I feel personally if the lager is too chilled on would miss the slight malt sweet at the onset. The hops show up more towards the end of the taste, in the beginning there is a slight malty sweetness, but that dissipates quickly as the dry sort of hop component of the taste comes into play. The hop had a grapefruit pith sort of bitterness, of course not as over powering.  Really good mouth feel for a lager I must say.

Overall

Really great drinkability.  Not too much hops like the standard american Double IPA, the hop taste is assertive but not overpowering as  like for instance Ruination Double IPA. I really like it. It doesn’t have that weak watered-down taste to it that most lagers suffer from

Food Pairing

From my experience definitely popular beef and poultry dishes hamburgers fries, any kinda of bbq. I can see this going with a lot of spicy sorta of Carribean food or Latin  American really. The Crispness and the bitterness will bring out the spicy.sweetness of the Latin American and Carribean food I would also add in asian food too, this lager is very versatile.

Conclusions

This beer was very very good. Since writing this I had a bunch more – meaning I lost count in many ways like a dude just at the cusp of good vibes post honeymoon and modern day mediocrity, lost count of how many times he has asked for it and his wife has said no only to give him lazy, boring, dry hand. its versatile it can be had everywhere, and in many situations, and all sorts of food. Same versatility for hand as well, it can be given or had any place any time by women of all ethnicities. Conclusions drink it, love it and then go take care of it yourself.

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Jul 21 2012

What I’m Drinking tonight: Brooklyn Brewery Summer Ale aka quickie on a tiled bathroom floor


I am totally backed up with these what I am drinking posts, might as well be someone (of any gender) who ate a foot long from Subway and didn’t go an hour before anal and then ate another footlong but in a  different way…. yeah I totally feel like Jared. Eat Fresh fuckers.

The Long Week

Ah man its been a long week for a few days I as in a bit a pain due to the SC-Disease thingie and it was so mutha-fucking hot. it was a hellacious week for me, a server broke down and I had to do all sort of things to make things right. Im building a large scale data analysis pipeline, jsut lots of headache and I have to update my new lectures I did last semester. I work long hours Friday and forgot to eat during the day. So I think I earned a nice drink.

What I am having 

Brooklyn Summer Ale to the rescue!  I have reviewed a pale ale before (Boddington’s) and didn’t think too highly of it. It was an epic let down I believe I described it as a flaccid penis surprise

I call this beer the big let down, or a flaccid erection. Yeah ladies you checked your man out you got all excited and you like what he working it, but its never got to how it has to be to get the job done. That’s how I feel every time I drink this beer. Why  well the beer is really really smooth, and when you pour it it looks like something out of a commercial. It is epic like a beautiful girl that actually wants you and shows interesting with you having to fork over money…… (read the post here)

There is something about the summer time that just predisposes the drinking of ales for me I’m not sure what it is. Summer always  for me is a time to enjoy to take in the scenery and women who consent. Its a period of  quiet reflection, because my parents birthday and my bday are exactly 2 weeks apart. For me I count a year from one bday to another and over the years i have found that  overlapping common periods of great intensity and great relaxation and great creativity and also great tiredness where my focus is on taking it easy.

Its been a tough year for me I think the toughtst to date for a comgination of reason and perhaps its my french heritage speaking but what better ambiance to be reflective then with the right alcohol of spirit.  For the moment I’m look for something not to complex not to over powering a taste, well balanced but not crap. Brooklyn Summer Ale was my choice easily beating out Geffen Kölsch

Brooklyn Summer Ale

Aka the Quickie on a Bathroom Tiled Floor

Getting Down to Business: La petite Mort

La petite mort is a euphemism/metaphor for an organism just like french fries is a euphemism for artery clogging. But of course, we cant leave it just at that. There is more to it than that:

 it can refer to the spiritual release that comes with orgasm or to a short period of melancholy or transcendence as a result of the expenditure of the “life force“

There is a mystical adage, popular in the Islamic mystical tradition that commands all aspirants to Die before you die, dying here is to the transient ego that we have come to identity ourselves with. What better way to die than to crank a couple out with someone who cant stand you for a good 7-10 minutes more than you can usually stand yourself and life Monday morning before you go to work.

I know your saying MrMary  mystical traditions and getting off, what a random assorted cocktail.  Rest assured there is a method to my madness, which is a product of my madness so…. it just makes sense to me.

There is sweetness to a quickie , to la petite mort, and then there is the contrasting almost existential moment following immediately afterwards which is maybe an experience on the deepest level of one’s mortality which is a slightly bitter libation. Sex is fun no doubt but it a a generative act for the species and can  be a generative act  for the individual if the right setting and ambiance is present. This beer had a sweetness and a bitterness to it. It wasn’t over powering and life-changing. It’s startling like the when the cold tiles hit warm skin and a means to an end. Having to get back to work, or back to class or doing whatever you had to great for the moment like a quickie on a bathroom tile floor.  It’s like pleasure without its opposite introspection

The Pour, The Aroma, The Taste

The Pour

I used this time my trusty beer mug. It was a light yellow orange-ish a darker amber I would say. There was initially a one finger head that quickly dissipated quickly and didn’t leave  any lacing at all in the  glass. It was how the head quickly disappeared into the vacuous reaches of space that queued me into the whole quickie analogy

The Aroma

The aroma was very very mild. It wasn’t too overbearing. There was the malt sweetish, mild traces of hops, some fruity smells common to most ales

The Taste and Mouthfeel

It was not overpowering at all. There was no overpowering  assertive taste it was mellow but not in a watery way like how Boddington’s is. There is that malty-sweetness one gets at first and then comes the slightly hoppy-bitterness. But it is ever so slight. It’s the crispness that furthered this analogy “”. Crispness in beer but the not so much of an over powering taste screams of summer to me. There was not much carbonation. There is that moment right into the pouring into that we get  the 1-2 finger head and then its over kind of like a quickie. Moving on,  carbonation is all at the beginning.

Food Pairing

Spicy foods (Indian food) definitely will go well with this. In my research I read that this would pair nicely with Middle Eastern and Mediterranean Food. I could see that. I would think fish, particular white meat fish and shellfish as well will go nicely with this. Things with a smokey flavor because of the slight sweetness and the tamed sort of calmed down bitterness. Cheese I would think sharp cheddar Monterrey pepper Jack Cheese.

Conclusions

A gourmet antipasto platter with smoked salmon, smoked chicken (underneath), roast beef, pâté, cabana sausage, brie-style cheese, cheddar-style goats milk cheese, Jensen’s red washed rind cheese, olives, tapenade, rocket pesto (behind the dish), and tomato chutney.

This is a cool beer for the beach, for relaxing for chilling in the backyard or in a cooler. its not too overpowering. It would go good with  spicy foods, sharp cheddar. I can imagine a cheese palette with some, blue cheese, cheddar pepper jack perhap, pepperoni, salami and olives, pickled mushrooms, great with antipasto really. This beer is very accessible and during the summer time accessibility and time is very important. Summertime is a unique time, it is made for enjoyment for going to the beach for activity for frolicking and so is this Summer Ale. Its suited to many spots like a quickie, good for a few quick one before you have to get back to whatever it is you were going to do.

 

 

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Jul 8 2012

What I drank: Left Hand Milk Stout or My Friend Steve’s First Black Girlfriend


I’ve been meaning to try more stouts , you know diversify the kind of things I drink. Last time in Vegas I drank enough tequila to be Mexican. by the way maybe I should be sampling more hard liquor. Lately I’ve been more about beer, before that I was all the Long Island Iced Tea, before that Rum and coke, before that vodka anything, before that Wine with the exception of Merlot I detest Merlot. For me Merlot is the overrate hot chick who is probably carrying STD’s knowingly or not. Got to Double bag just for bragging right. Yeah it’s a heavy price to pay to let everyone.

Love that Dark Meat

My friend Steve (name changed) one day, I guess after watching a lot of Hip Hop and Reggae videos wanted to go out with a black girl. I guess his arriving late to thanksgiving a few months earlier really impacted him,  turns out everyone got to the White meat and left him the dark stuff, and he loved it, it was tastier and juicier. He also is a fan of Sean Paul. Long story short, Steve loved how, to quote him  ”Dem Bitches be Earthquaking dat ass“. He wanted to my advise on how to approach black women.

This beer reminded me of that because, Steve Eventually found himself some  brown sugar to sweeten his coffee. Stouts by nature are dark, full-bodied, they are sometimes sweet on the tongue, Sometimes stouts are really bitter, like a lot of black women I know.  As always I gave Steve some great advice.

Milk Stouts

Some History and words on Milk Stout

Milk stout (also called sweet stout or cream stout) is a stout containing lactose, a sugar derived from milk. Because lactose is unfermentable by beer yeast, it adds sweetness, body, and calories to the finished beer. Milk stout was claimed to be nutritious, and was given to nursing mothers, along with other stouts, such as Guinness.

 

Getting down to Business

I told Steve that you don’t change up your game to get girls of a different race. Just be yourself I told him so other positive stuff to boost up his confidence. I told him to look for a girl that is always sweet and not bitter. I gave him a list of neighborhoods in Brooklyn where he should not date… Long story short I gave my homey the hook-up and I am about to do the same for you. As always, armed with the proper information, confidence my friend was able to scratch that number 3 off his bucket list.

The Pour, The Aroma, The Taste

Ideally this should be poured in a  pint glass, but I used my trusty beer mug.  I used a regularly carbonated bottled. I imagine if it was in a Nitrous can it would be even more of a visual feast for the eyes but it was pretty sexy nevertheless.

The Pour

Like I told Steve, getting good head is never something to be turned down, and this beer was no exception. Easily 2 fingers worth of a foamy beige-ish color head.  You can tell a lot about a beer from the type of head you get, I suppose that applies to dating as well. The head of the beer is like a cage that traps and catches the volatile chemicals that that will play a major rol in the taste. Head on a date (for either sex) is also a cage that  while it may not trap you it may way-lay your plans for the Golden Girls or Law and Order reruns. The longer it lasts of course the better, the beer I am talking about. This can apply especially if the protagonist can hold their breathe like an expert snorkle-er, but it has to be good.

The Smell

I get a bit of that roasted smell common to stouts, but am quickly over powered by the smells of coffee and a Callibaut or Scharfenberger semi sweet chocolate that I used to make a classic chocolate souffle.  From the smell I can already see this would be great to go with dessert coffee or semi-sweet/dark chocolate ish.

The Taste

First this had a great taste there is slight sweetness and creaminess due to the style of beer  namely the bits of lactose added adding a layer of sweetness to what is present always with stouts. I like the interplay between sweetness and bitterness, actually reminded me of a black girl I dated. Really over powered by the semi sweet chocolate and coffee taste but in a good way like when its my turn to sit back and the girl to work for it. The carbonation was moderate helped add to the smooth creamy mouth feel, a slight tong tingling (wont make the joke), milky after-taste. What I like the most about this is that the bitterness wasn’t too strong wasn’t too assertive. I am not well versed in creamy/milk stouts in the dispensing part for sure. This was really a good venture taste wise into this type of beer.

Conclusions

This is a good start, I am sure there are some which are more balanced and the coffee and chocolate isn’t as overpowering. I didn’t find it watery or overly bitter. Definitely some sorta of chocolate/coffee-ish dessert, next time i have this I may get this really rich tiramisu. Like Steve’s first Gf this was good for him of course, my kinda good is on a whole different level. It was a nice first foray into  a whole new world, which if I remember correctly there was a magic carpet ride too but a bit different than the  one depicted in Aladdin, matter of fact it was also over sideways and under too that magical carpet ride. You know now that I come to think of it that sound is very dirty. I dont think i can look at it the same way.

Cheers to Steve and his first black gf  and to trying new things

Shout out to the Promethean Times Blog for being funny cool and liking cream stouts

By the way

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Jul 7 2012

What I’m Drinking tonight: Narragansett Cream Ale aka Lazy Self-Loving


Salvador Dali’s depiction of Hitler Masturbation. its just here for no reason

Back in the day before I had the money to indulge my refined palette I drank a ton of cheap beer. You know the kind in the discount ale of the grocery store that has an American Flag and just says Beer on it. Suffice it to say that those beers tasted  like the smells of homelessness, depravity and ripped open garbage bags doused with Hawaiian punch that frequents alleys ways. One day luck would have it I had a can of Wexford’s Irish Cream Ale, and was probably in retrospect foreshadowed by the named I creamed my pants . I couldn’t tell if it was that good or I had been drink stuff that was so bad that when something mediocre came along. I acknowledge now that the Wexford’s was my rebound, and I would go on to cream my pants for better chicks (sorry that got too cathartic) beers with better body, mouth feel, and gave better head, when poured of course. I vowed to revisit the cream ale family and sample, and so here we are :

Narragansett Cream Ale

Cream Ale was a style of ale popular in America before prohibition. its kind of like a larger without such hoppiness and bitterness , slightly sweet fruity citrus grainy/grassy type of aroma. Of course there is a smooth finish that of course let’s you know is a cream ale. I like it and good. My underwear is clean I didn’t expectorate phallically. But lets get into it, Wait Before that I must say that this is a very progressive forward thinking beer, this beer supports women and the many challenging issues they are facing in the political arena. I not sure how they do it ladies but someone looking out for the clam and not just to stuff the flagship product in it, although I have seen videos where that happens. This beer is good definitely better than the semen tainted Urine that passed for beer at the market and local corner store. Let’s finally get into it.

Getting Down to Business

This beer brought me back to those figurative lazy summer afternoons  when I was stuck in an apartment with no a/c or fan while NYC was in the grips of a heatwave, i was too lazy to pound one out with the proper finesse and  enthusiasm, but proceeded to do a lazy half ass job. Many married women can relate to doing just enough to make it count but not enough to make it memorable or satiating.

The Pour, The Aroma, The Taste

The Pour

I used a nice clean chilled beer mug. I poured it slowly like I cleared to slide to 4th base , someone homer’ed. On the way to home base I noticed a real beautiful yellow-orange color with a 1.5 ~ 2 finger head. After some time the two fingered head disappeared into a thick carpet of foam (just like in the movies actually well those kinda movies). It was nice.

Aroma

Unlike most carpet I get into the aroma was slightly sweet, there were fruity and flowery smells. It is lightly malty-ish, it had the smell character of cream, almost as if smoothness could have a smell you’d smell it here. 

Taste

One isn’t over-powered by many of the different component of the taste. There is an initial sweetness balanced out by the slight hoppiness. But the emphasis as is oral sex in the back seat of a car is on  the mouth-feel. The combination of carbonation  and the not to assertive hoppiness give this beer and very great drinkability. The sweetness is overpowering  neither is the hoppiness  the creamyness isn’t too much that you feel that a horse mistook you mouth for the vaginal cavity of a mare in estrous. Well balanced.

Pairings

I dunno if you guys cook Indian food generally there is some yogurt always served to cool down the intensity of spices  perfect example of this is cucumber mint raita , or Greek tzatziki sauce which is a related sauce, or the Persian mast -o-khiar . Any persian lady readers ,  if you make a fesenjoon I will please you sexually for free btw, provided after each time you make it I’m not obliged, the hottest bitter cup of black tea, call or do dishes (j/k I’m sure you have a dishwasher and herbal). Why am I telling you this ? Well because with this type of beer I can see it going very well with spicy foods, check it out

Conclusions

just enough for it to sorta count, not enough to put you out

One day many of you may experience the true gift of marriage and you will understand that this beer is good, good enough to get me over and have it count, but not good enough to make me go outta my way for it, like do some housework, or listen to your bullshit work stories about bitches trying to destroy you and your family or your wardrobe frustration.

Av4IZiaCMAEEFkO
Jun 20 2012

What I am Drinking Tonight: My New Cocktail Creation Two In the Pink


I have a chemistry degree and any excuse I get to mix things together and experiment I go for, which is why some of my ex-gf used to walk with a mean limp. But this post isn’t about that. It was only a matter of time before I created my own signature drink. MrMary is multi-dimensional its not just beer, or wine or the cocktails, it’s about the totality of experience.

How It Came About

I was bored and it was hot and I wanted a refreshing drink. Unfortunately there are other people in this house who once I start making something for me want some too.  Judging from the palettes here the general consensus is that no one wants to taste  the harshness of the alcohol which sucks for me I tend to like to strong drinks.

What You will Need for this Drink 

Equipment

Plenty of Ice
A Tall Glass  
A Shaker 

Booze & Other Stuff 

Tropicana Ruby Red Grapefuit Cocktail 
Alize Rose
Simple Syrup
Sprite
Vodka  

I fill my shaker with ice and my serving glass as well and I leave them both in freezer. Then I go and put on some pants because everyone complaining that I cannot make drinks in my bikini draws on the hottest day of the year. Then I assemble everything in front of me.  ( i measure out my drinks instead of counting and using an easy to pour spout on the bottle.)

Getting Down to Business

The pour and measure the following in this order, then pour into my shaker:

  1. 0.25 oz of Simple Syrup
  2. 2.0   oz of Vodka
  3. 0.5   oz of Alize Rose (pink)
  4. 4.0  oz of the Ruby Read Grapefruit  Drink (pink)

I give this a good shake then I pour it into my final serving glass. Then I top the drink off with some lemon line soda (7UP Sprite – Whatever You got) add a  straw  and then garnish with a wedge of  lemon or lime skewered with a cherry.

My Creation The ‘Two in the Pink’: Vodka, Rose Alize, Ruby Red Grapefruit Juice cocktail, Simple Syrup and Sprite served on the rocks

My Rationale

I had tried a rose Alize martini and I fucking loved it. However my peeps in my house didnt like the strong alcohol aftertaste. The recipe called for 2.5 oz of Alize Rose and 1.0 oz of Vodka.  While the Vodka mellowed out the sharp taste of the Alize Rose it wasnt enough for these discerning palates. So I thought it would be nice to have a drink really cold served on the rocks, topped off with some lemon lime soda. I was thinking of Grapefruit soda but 3 in the pink is a little excessive by my standards, maybe after a few drinks to loosen up, but straight away cmon now.

So I figured I would make a vodka based drink with ruby red grapefruit juice.  If I had a grapefruit I would opt to use the juice from that with a little simple syrup then I added about 0.5 oz of the Alize so there would be great aromatics coming off the drink (It is a blend of French vodka, strawberry, lychee and rose petals) and it would increase the alcohol content and complexity of taste. I really like vodka because it doesn’t have a very assertive taste like tequila. Anyways  after shaking it I get a cool pink color fill about 2-3 oz of sprite in the glass and voila.

I am still playing with the ratios a bit and I might add 0.25 – 0.5 ounce of fresh squeeze lime juice and garnish with a lemon peel or add some Agostura Orange Bitters (which I dont have at the moment) (it’s not officially a cocktail without bitters – I’ve explained this to my lady friends  but well you know the whole Pineapple juice thing)

The Effect

It was refreshing everyone liked it, the flavors mask the alcohol content. It was just nice to sip on on a hot day. Problem is I had a good 4 plus the martini before  as I was testing out ratios. I will be tweaking this as the days go along. I may pass it to a bartender to tweak and get back to me with what works

I have to remember to take a picture before I start drinking it
Jun 19 2012

What I Drank Saturday: La Fin Du Monde Tripel Style Beer aka My 1st Canadian Erection


Happy Bloomsday Bitches!!!!!

For those of you who don’t know what Bloomsday is lemme summarize briefly:

Bloomsday is a commemoration and celebration of the life of Irish writer James Joyce during which the events of his novel Ulysses (which is set on 16 June 1904) are relived. It is observed annually on 16 June in Dublin and elsewhere.

Can you guess how I rang in my Bloomsday? 

La Fin Du Monde is an award winning Belgian Style tripel. What is a tripel let alone a Belgian style tripel. At first I thought it was a sloppy cacophonous orgy with drunk Belgian college students but  alas I was wrong.  A tripel is simple a strong pale ale from the Belgium or the Netherlands. Strong in this sense means it is 9% ABV (Alcohol By Volume).

Some Notes before getting into it

I think here in America a lot of our first taste of beer was some god awful shit that we had to have almost frozen to dull the taste of ass: case a point Budweiser aka the not even a wet-napkin once over rim-job of beers. (It’s shitty). For good quality beer they don’t have to be frozen, served chilled about 41 degrees is good, The taste, aroma and flavors that are discernible I feel are dependent on temperature.

Snifter glass

Also depending on what I am drinking I like to use assorted glassware.  Some glassware are great for head, ..hmm going to rephrase that. I mean that the shape of the glassware helps gives a rich and creamy frothy head on the beer when it’s poured correctly. I figure from here on end to mention what glassware I am using. In this case I am using.

I noticed that I wasn’t always picking up the more subtle or volatile of the aromas of the beer. So I thought I would need to use  a different type of glass. If I had a sniffer I would have used it for this particular brew, Instead I used my wheat beer glass  which was sexy.

Vast Structure of Recollection

This beer is made in Quebec and for a while it got me thinking about Canada. It was like Proust’s madeleine and orange hibiscus tea for me. For a while I used to spend my vacation  in Quebec in particular in Montreal visiting my grandfather and family. it was a lovely time for me. I love Montreal it is my second home really from NYC.  While I speak English predominantly, there is something about speaking or hearing french (My first language) in the streets. I remember visiting The oratory of St Joseph for mass sometimes with family on New Years Eve around Midnight. I remember the farmers market, Parc Jarry, this restaurant we would always go to in China Town, I remember going to Mt Royal because we were unable to see an Expos game. I remember meeting an actual Monty. After hearing how the Monty’s always get their man, I found real live Monty’s to be not that homosexual. I remember my first cocktail ever, I had at the wake of my grandfather’s funeral a Whiskey and Amaretto on the rocks. I remember seeing his flags of Quebec and the Vive le Quebec on his house.  Ah that tinge of sadness. I think those were among the happiest times of my youth.

BTW- Canadian girls are much friendlier than a lot of their  counterparts, really approachable, pretty. However judging from how crazy I’ve seen Canadiennes (female Canadians in French)  get for hockey, they just may be demons in bed which is find for me as I tame demons on the weekends.

Getting Down to Business

I have to remember to take a picture before I start drinking

The Glass, The Pour, The Aroma, The Taste

This beer brought me back. It’s really really good. I haven’t sampled to many of the other tripel style of beers but all the recommendation from friends actually for once paid off.

The Glass

If you were to look it up the Weizenbeer Glass like drunk large-chested female tourist from Sweden just taking bullshit pictures in front of you on the train, is made to produce a decent sized and voluminous head allowing for better olfaction. In regards to picking out subtle nuances of aromas this really was much better than my usual glass beer mug. Of course this glass was made for a Wheatbeer: etc Bluemoon, UFO HefeWeizen etc

The Pour

Beautiful color, beautiful pour. It is about 2-2 finger sized head (ladies this is the equivalent of just the tip). Coloring is darker than a pilsner, it is like a golden color, similar to some specimen of Amber I have from the shores of Latvia. The head is white which sets off to me a nice contrast in colors especially in the Weizen Glass. 

Aroma

 Man I got a slight sweetness from the aroma. Definitely the malty yeasty sort of sweetness that one would get from a Trappist or Belgian Beer like Leffe Blonde for instance. There are slighty fruity/flowery smells. There isn’t that overpowering smell of alcohol though. To give you an example Malt Liquor in the US is generally 6-10 % alcohol I believe, and the smell of that is overpowering of alcohol and this is 9%

Taste

Great carbonation throughout, You aren’t overpowered by the 9% ABV content it is smooth and well mask by the balance of flavors, there is a slight sweetness you can intuit from the smell but its not too sweet. Plus the sweetness is balance by an ever so slight bitterness in the aftertaste. This is a really well balanced beer. There is a great mouth feel, very satisfying, very drinkable, very all kinds of awesome its has a slight spicy-sorta kick from the 9% alcohol definitely a creamy texture provided by the carbonation is great. The carbonation is great serious continuous gentle flow throughout really makes a serious contribution to the mouth feel. The warmer the beer got the more volatile aromas and tastes  I could smell, but I was already buzzed and didn’t really give a shit. I got a not buzz from this which was a bit unexpected. well I wrote down: mild citrus smell- who knows and yeah I write notes when I drink to review this stuff for you guys.

Pairings Cocktails

Because of the high alcohol content  some people say that this is paired with certain spicy food that have a great citrus spicy food. I’m not a connoisseur or knowledgeable on tripel style beer  so I cannot really recommend what to pair it with. Also a lot of times I drink not looking  to pair anything just to enjoy it. But there are some cocktails and recipes this can be used in check it out.

I am big on  using booze to cook. But Cook is an art. There has to be a delicate balance, one cannot load up or over power the food with booze like the freckled girl at a party who is shy but has the mouth of a pirate hooker of the days of yore.

Conclusion

I really loved this beer and when I find a place that has it on tap I will be there like static in an an excessively hairy crotch – not that I would know just guessing .. Gaussian distribution of charges etc. This beer was well balanced, easy on the eyes, and brought me back to that special place like my first Canadian erection. I remember she had long hair, nice smile, she was stacked but not so much that it would call my sense of style and love of women’s personalities into question, I saw her at the Jean Talon Station on my way to get to the Sherbrooke Station or Berri-Quam. Yeah definitely drink this beer !!!! and TheDaterofBoys is still my fav Canadienne though, hands down !