I’m not saying that to be overly congratulatory. I don’t have it in me. I’m saying that because I mean it.
I blog, under the pseudonym of MrMary MuthaFucking Poppins, and I have an attitude problem. Well I hate being insincere. I don’t have a schtick or a gimmick. The same way I am on the blog, I am in life. I like many different things and they are all reflected here. What gets me is that sometimes I wonder if there is anyone being real anymore in this sort of setting. I mean what about the person behind the jokes, what about you the real fucking person.
Normally this wouldn’t be an issue for me. The other day I had a slight depressive episode, and I couldn’t write, talk much, or go and comment on blogs and all that shit. I find that when I am depressed, if I dwell in the feeling too long it becomes all encompassing. The things that help return back to normalcy are watching/reading about something real. It takes me out of my own mind which can be a prison and it stirs up real emotions which are my ticket back to reality.
Normally when I read blogs, I am most attracted to “realness”, to sincerity. Sometimes I feel that the same crap that I thoroughly dislike in my daily life manifests itself in the blogosphere. But what troubles me is that I cannot tell if what I see is really the case because depression colours the lens through which I perceive the world. I do a lot of blog surfing and sometimes fit seems that people blogging are trying to sell me on the fact that they are funny, or hip, or cool, or they are good looking when to me they just have to be. Not funny or witty, just be. Personally I find a woman who can be herself without being a billboard for socio-cultural constructs pretty attractive. Granted it helps if she doesn’t have penis or beard, has a pony tail and prefers doggy style to missionary but that’s a different story. (Sorry I had to go for that joke)
Do you get what I’m saying?
I am more than willing to concede that I may just be a mad man howling in the wind, the proverbial idiot telling the wind my tale so it cna bring my lamentation beyond the field of my vision.
Blogging is Tough but rewarding
I can generate content easy for blogs. There are many auxiliary things that come with blogging. For me blogging comes with a conflict. I want to produce quality content, well what for me passes as quality. I also really enjoy interacting with those of you who like the refuse that comes out of my head and like and comment. It’s a delicate balance between writing and answering everyone for me at least.
I got a chance to read a post from the lady with the 150 watt smile. While she refers to herself simple as Becca, and is clear funny and cute, if I may say so, she is a person of substance. I have the opportunity to work with for an upcoming blog tour but she really put of a real post that was helpful to me.
Instead of leaving a comment on her page I just decided to share with you all this post and take you along the journey, through the obfuscating mentation, and cantakerous diction.
Hear is the Post:
I refrained from some dirty tutu jokes this whole post are you proud of me ?