Baby-popping celebrity Octomom, aka Nadya Suleman, has crashed into a drug rehab center in California. A rep says she has been abusing Xanax pills she takes for stress—a condition we’re going to guess came along somewhere between birthing 14 in vitro babies and makingmasturbation porn to pay for their care. She plans to be away from the kids for a month and, even though a source says her bourgeoning porn career could pay for treatment, she has taken the center up on its offer to foot the bill. [Source]
MrMary Weighs In
If I could ever boast of having 80 fingers inside me at the same time I wouldn’t be checking into rehab I would be checking into pep boys to have my fucking chassis repairs. It is amazing you can be a celebrity for popping out babies, I want to be a celebrity but I am handicapped in that department because I can read and write and didn’t lease out a variety of my orifices to pay my way to college.
[Not that doing that is wrong, I feel if it makes you happy to have your anus or vagina a mini meat storage then by all mean use the free market to get you the best prices and whole sale napkin prices, you know the trickle down effect thing a lot of Republican keep talking about.]
Ok and masturbation porn, I would imagine it would take an odd number of vaginoplasties greater than five to turn that close range shot gun wound back into a vagina. I think the real cause of her addiction and rehab is that all the Burger kings horses and all the kings men couldn’t sew her vagina back together again. It’s kind of what got her famous. She should have taken an insurance on it like J-LO did her ass. Maybe they can take some cartilage from her face and fat from her head to reconstruct it
I was just being silly and fooling around. I hope the Octomom gets better and I hope her kids are faring well. Illness and addiction is a terrible thing and I think no one should have to deal with that alone. So here is to the OctoMom getting better quickly. I hope she also stops doing any kind of porn as well.
- Dirty On The 30: Disney Buys Out LucasFilms, Ocotomom In Rehab & Is Snooki Faking It? (923now.cbslocal.com)
- Jocular Look @Todays’ News: Olivia Wilde is bummed everyone’s talking about her vagina (aspoonfulofsuga.wordpress.com)
- Octomom Checks Into Rehab (huffingtonpost.com)
- Links: I’d be in rehab too if I was Octomom! (popbytes.com)
- Xanax Rehab For Octomom: Nadya Suleman Leaves 14 Kids For 30 Days (contactmusic.com)
- Nadya ‘Octomom’ Suleman is at the end of her rope (popbytes.com)