In an article entitled: Mind Thoughts… with Michael Ian Black – Let’s Not Fuck, Shall We?, the author Michael Ian Black, (referred to from now on as MIB) attacks the common held assumptions about the male libido:
Male libido is assumed to be a constant, quivering thrum. For some men, maybe it is. But for me, as much as I enjoy the old in-n-out, the rubba-dub-dubba, the squeak-n-bubble, I have never craved it the way our culture has led me to believe I should, not even during my fabled Horny Years from ’91 to ’95.
It’s strange. Men feel like they have to conform to some idea of masculinity that bears the same relationship to normal sexuality as professional bodybuilding does to normal human musculature. Was it always like this? Did men always have this pressure on them to maintain (or pretend to maintain) a hypertrophic sex drive?
MIB states explicitly “I just don’t want sex that much.”
My First Inclination
My First inclination, in part because I don’t like to be so serious after waking up from an impromptu nap where I was was snoring at my desk and also because I went to an all boys catholic school is to call this guy out for being a fairy, and make the pedantic jejune jokes that made me famous in the expanses of my imagination.
Unfortunately I’ve had this disease where I have to like the person before I actually can consider grinding organs with that person. Granted when I am drunk and near NYU and I see a girl passed out behind the dumpster I get aroused, but that kind of action is no different than porking a glove full of jelly in the back of the theatre showing of the Lion King (why yes I can feel the love tonight). Not only do you have nothing left to show afterwards (after glove loving), but pretty soon the you’re surrounded by a bunch of dudes that are about to kabob you and teach you personally the finer points of rotisserie. There is also the possibility that you might go to prison and get gang-raped for the black out drunk girl thing behind the dumpster.
Personally if it was all about the sex I would like anything else I want, pay for the best quality. I don’t necessarily mean escort, because there are many other person and private arrangements one can get into where payments isn’t equated to money.
I like the connection, the laughs, the doing stuff together, the tears, the arguments the whole 9 yards. The orifice-plugging is the icing on the ‘cake’, figuratively and literally too depending on what you like.
The Real Issue
The real issue here is that in a society were consumerism controls and influences both the public sphere and personal spaces, it’s the companies and the culture of which they sell and are a part that polices masculinity and femininity.
One conclusion I came to when I interviewed four lovely ladies To Celebrate Women’s Month on the blog was that to suppress females in culture is to suppress the feminine energies of the psyche socially and individually as well, if one wants to get into that Jungian psychology thing. Masculinity and femininity cannot be defined or studied I feel outside the context of each other especially in our time as we are in the dawn I feel culturally historically technologically in a new age there is a bit of a need to redefine these these rolls based on the current individual and social needs globally really.
I see that more and more commercials using this to their advantage to cell Axe Body Wash and other products to targeted demographics. The companies feed us an idea of what we are to be, how we are to act, how a man is supposed to be, how a women is supposed to act etc…
But it’s all bullshit to me at least. I think leaving in NYC for me really exposes all this subversive marketing to the light of day that why I fucking love NYC, and I’m a NY’er to the core. So many people so many stories, so much reality if one is willing to look out the fucking window or take the train at 42nd street see homeless hungry crazy people, being stepped over by really wealthy people by the newsstand with pictures of Beyonce on magazine covers. Or one day when right before the electricity goes out for the and you loose two weeks worth of food you kinda of wise up to some stuff.
One of the things you wise up to is how many different shades of grey there are in everything, sexual preference, in likes and dislikes, in politics, in something as mundane as neckties or underwear. I kind of wonder how long we are gonna let this sorta of consumerist hive mentality dictate the pace of our lives who we interact with. I’m not saying consumerism is all bad, because all generalization even this one are wrong however I want to know where does one draw the line and say this is enough i dont want society and companies having that much of a say in my affairs.
Of course I am sleepy now again and will take MIB’s Ending because I’m so tired of not having sex my creativity is zapped:
To me, sex isn’t even about sex. Fundamentally, it’s about acceptance, having somebody desire you enough to allow you to envelop them and wanting that person to envelop you in return. When the culture tells me I’m not having enough of it, it seems like what it’s telling me is that the culture itself does not accept me. What can I do to become more acceptable? Buy those jeans, drive that car, smother myself in Axe body spray. It’s a losing battle. I can never accumulate enough stuff—money, lovers—to satisfy the itch our shitty culture is causing. If anything, it’s like a venereal disease; the more I scratch at it, the worse I end up feeling.
I want to be a good man. I feel like I am a good man. I’m just not a horny man. Unless we’re talking about BJs.
- Book Review: ‘You’re Not Doing It Right’ by Michael Ian Black (bookpeopleblog.wordpress.com)
- John McCain’s Daughter, Meghan McCain and Michael Ian Black from Comedy Central Visit Sapphire Gentlemen’s Club in Las Vegas Nevada (prweb.com)
- Nerdist News Talks To Michael Ian Black About His New Book, And Snacks (nerdist.com)
- Afternoon Bites: Michael Ian Black Interviewed, John D’Agata In Conversation, Dave Tompkins On Rammellzee, And More (vol1brooklyn.com)
- Michael Ian Black Defends Louis C.K. From Rush Limbaugh Comparison After Comedian Drops From Rtcc Host Job (filmworldnews.wordpress.com)