Until the time where poverty, famine, riots and new diseases are laying waste to American society and I have to move to Canada my patriotism is unquestionable. It is unwavering because it has been built on a bedrock of historical ineducation, misinformation and general ignorance. Yet, despite all of this I find myself caring slightly more about Kim Kardasian than the Turkish government has about the Armenian Genocide. But from that space of meaningless concern, I can clearly see how Kim Kardashian has served as a primary example of why the USA is so great.
The New Face Of Social Mobility
“Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”
While the many Americans who were already established here for a generation or two viewed the incoming waves of immigrants as wretched refuse, those immigrants coming here were subjected to a fair, non-violent, non-racially charged society as portrayed in the bowdlerized versions of history pumped out to the eager school-children of later generations historically far removed.
So now in today’s world where the growing do-nothingness of the american citizens are responsible for the ever widening gulf of rich and poor and all our social ills, upward mobility is as easy as swallowing – a cost efficient skill coincidentally we are born knowing- which for a lot of big business officials means less company money spent on training programs and hookers .
The New Face of American Social Mobility
What I am driving at is that this picture to the left is the new face of Social Mobility in America. It is pixilated, sexually suggestive, pleonastically littered with bodily fluids, illegal for children under the age of 18 to see, grows hairs on the palms of pubescent boys and is entirely useless in discussions of debt management, fiscal planing, education and healthcare.
A singular act of selfless throat clogging, recorded on video without intent to sell (though with a matching soundtrack and dense commentary) has propelled Ms Kim Kardashian into the heart of many Americans. Unfortunately due to already high levels of obesity and plaque formation this which under normal circumstances wouldn’t, has further deprived the collective ‘heart ‘Americans of a source of nourishment.
But there is silver lining to this horrible stain on America’s freshly ironed moral uniform depending on the camera angle. Those of you with young daughters, don’t have much to explain. Hard work, self-respect is unnecessary. Its much more profitable to be treated as a mere object. Submitting to the immoral excesses of the right person is all one needs to succeed in life. Forget that positive healthy self-image.
Thanks to Ms Kardashian we can be sure that our children and grand children will make use of TIVO to return to the time before we unleashed the rampant socio-cultural de-evolution on the failing society they will have inherited. (I think Last of the Mohicans, Unforgiven and Dr. Quinn Medicine woman would be a good place to start if my calculations are correct.)
So here is to Kim Kardashian! You have proved how great our country is. By debasing yourself as a woman to and appealing to the lowest common denominator, your have brought out the best in us and succeed without even having to swallow – your pride that is.
- Hell Froze Over: Kim Kardashian Avoids The Paparazzi [PHOTOS] (socialitelife.com)
- Tyler Perry’s Letter to Fans about Kim Kardashian’s Role (heartofcity.wordpress.com)
- Kris Humphries Breaks His Silence After Kardashian Divorce (huffingtonpost.com)
- Kris Humphries Talks About Kim Kardashian Divorce at Press Conference (binsidetv.net)
- No Elle Magazine Cover For Kim Kardashian Because ‘She Doesn’t Do Anything’ (997now.radio.com)
- Olivia Wilde: I Empathize with Kim Kardashian (justjared.buzznet.com)
- Tyler Perry Defends Kim Kardashian Kasting as “Responsible” (thehollywoodgossip.com)